My first kill

My first kill

 

 

The thought was scary,

At first,

I thought I was,

Insane.

The first drop of blood,

touching my finger,

driving my mind,

in a haze.

At first my car,

was only speeding down the road,

but then you walked in front,

blocking my way,

surprising me,

making sure that i'd hit you.

I stopped and tried to move,

but you moved as I did,

and I hit you dead center,

only,

you weren't dead.

You were breathing,

you chest heaving.

I ran to your side,

with the blood gushing,

I reached for my phone,

but you screamed,

"End my life! End it now! I deserve nothing! Kill me with this knife, it has history of my family and war. Kill me with honor."

All I thought was,

What is this dude thinking,

He has honor of jumping in front of my car,

And being hit?

And now he's telling me to just stab him?

Making sure that he dies with "honor"?

I walked inside of my car.

Good. I thought,

It's still intact.

I started it up,

and looking at the guy in the road,

I had tears in my eyes,

What was I doing?

Do I want to do this?

Am I really meant for this?

Then I thought,

He told me to do this.

 

*       *              *

I headed straight towards him.

The guy's face before I hit him,

was priceless.

He now has no honor.

*         *        *

 

I'm glad I met that guy.

He helped me figure out,

a new thing about my life.

I'm good at killing.

And now I read the papers,

After all i'm always on the front page.

Author's Note

sorry if it's a bit confusing, i just thought while i typed

Reviews

[marcie]

i liked the dark feel surrounding the tale , this would probably make a better story than poem as id like to see how the main character developes

[M. Amphet Salt]

You have potential. There were things here that really need to be tweeked. Get with me if you would like to further your craft and I'll give you my mini-style and grammar lesson through the site. I like the concept.

[James Watts]

A dark write, this one. I agree on a bit confusing in places, but nothing that turned me off to the piece. Nice write.

[revenant21]

It was a bit confusing, but the story behind it is good. I liked it, great job. :D

~revenant

[Adora.xo]

Nicely done dear. A bit confusing at first, but then the end pulled it together. Great job

~Adora

[Katie L]

i love this, great job

[Luna]

wow this is good. i wonder if this is how some serial killers really think. "oh the first guy told me to kill me so it is ok for me to kill more people just for the heck of it. plus im good at it." great job.

[A.Lee]

Wow... I love how you developed this. First it was an accident and then the guy begged for death. And now this guy has a taste for killing. Scary. It makes you think... what goes through a killer's mind? Where did it all start? Nice job. This piece has a lot of emotion in it for such a cold subject.

[Dakota]

Good imagery. The end was a nice turn. Good write!

[Dutch Jr.]

Great write. Good emotion-evoking vocabulary.