Premonition

Weary from all the heavy lifting.

I had an intrusive premonition.

Like an unwanted, wedding crasher.

We raised our glasses to toast brevity.

Paired-dancing on life's parquet floor.

 Supporting an illusory ideal.

I wonder when the herniated honeymoon will end ...

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

so ... not much faith in the "lucky" couple eh!? ... especially like the toast to brevity .. it has an unsung place in life doesn't it ... and the brevity of your poem itself a tribute to what can be accomplished in short order ... there is a whole setting, scene and cast of characters that swirl my imagination in reading your "Premonition" ... so well done says i .. i do hope the party goers are mistaken .. happy endings are possible
E.

[Pete]

thanks E. perhaps that's why they hold them in churches with open bars afterwards - we need all the help we can get. remember to sleep with one eye open after the rice has been thrown ... :)

[Einstein Noodle]

true dat brother! :) its a risky leap we take

[barleygirl]

This feels kinda twisted to me, in a good way. It kinda stomps out any expectations & forces the reader to constantly rethink where this is going & what it means. I finally came upon the idea that you could be spoofing those times in life when we get carried away with something that SEEMS like a good thing, but eventually turns out to be a NOT-SO-GOOD thing, but by then we are kinda addicted to upholding the deal. A bad wedding that we can't admit was so wrong from the start. The phrase "herniated honeymoon" is the kind of thing all writers wish they'd thought up! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Pete]

twilight zone music - do do do do. different meaning possible but what you say is pretty much exactly what i was thinking when i did this. sometimes we let the' little heads' do the thinking for us or we get married to an ideal and not reality but what good is life if reality is all there is? that's why travel to fantasyland. thanks for sharing your heavy thoughts Margie ... :)

[Willoby]

Sometimes, when ya know, ya just know! Weary is a good tell... A toast to brevity! When all parties are aware, Touche!

Thoughts aplenty...
Willoby

[Pete]

sometimes we don't want to know. we're caught up in a whirlwind. thank you for sharing your skeptical vows ... :)