I Asked You

A satire on T.V. and American pop-culture

I asked you not to vote for plastic, pretentious, pandering, politicians.

I pleaded with you not to drive a tin can sedan idling at lollipop stop signs.

I begged you not to watch caustic, callous, coronary T.V. commercials.

I insisted that you not have dandelion dandruff dreams.

I requested that you not feign french-fried freedom.

I wished you would turn your back on constipated, kangaroo courts dispensing jaundiced justice.

I argued my disdain for your vinegar vagrants & vacationing vagabonds wearing ornery overcoats.

I wrangled against your electric eateries boasting viagra-tic voices sporting varicose veins.

I entreated you not to be lured by silicone mountains.

I appealed to you to stop drinking evil spirits.

I beseeched you to cease your incendiary cancer sticks.

Finally, I called you on a cellophane cell phone.

You b***h buttoned me.

Guess you were too busy doing all the things I asked you not to do...

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

'I Asked You'
Pete,
This shows all the ways that we all wish we could have the power to influence others.
Just when we think we know something we find out in the end that maybe we were wrong or that the phrase 'the lesser of two evils comes into play.
People will do what works for them as we all do.
Change is a personal thing and it is also work and takes dedication.
Great write.
Kathy

[Pete]

wrote this a very long time ago when i first joined the cafe. changing is the hardest thing for us mere mortals and we do indeed tend to want things our way but that usually doesn't work with others. we usually revert to the basics if who we are. thank you for sharing thoughts dearest Kathy ... :)

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Pete, nice wisdom for an early write.
Thanks for being real..so good to know.
Kathy

[Pete]

thanks Kathy. that was my downfall in life - trying to be real in a fake world, trying to be good and decent in a bad and sinful world ... :)

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Pete,
You try and that matters a lot. I am glad that you have the desire to keep making good choices. Have a great week!
Kathy

[Sami Khalil]

A very funny satire. You touch up on so many subjects and subject them to your magnifying lens. Keep them coming,...:).................

[Pete]

thank you so much Sami. i appreciate your encouragement and positivity.

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome positively...;)...................

[Kirsty Woodward]

This reminds me of the way I am with my parents. Constantly trying my best to educate them on politics when they couldn't give a damn. Constantly telling them all the T.V they watch is brainwashing and boring. When really, I'm wasting my breath because they'll do whatever they please anyway, like they always have done, and if that makes them happy then so what, eh!
Also, I adore the use of alliteration. You can never have too much of it in my opinion. It's so fun to work with.
This is great piece!

[Pete]

Thanks so much. I was in a playful mood one day and came up with this. Best regards.

[David Scott]

You did a great job finding new words for every line. You, "asked, pleaded, begged, insisted, requested, wished, argued, wrangled, entreated, appealed, beseeched, and called". What more could you do other than be patient, listen, wait, and love without expectations?

A delightful read!

[Pete]

Always a pleasure David. Thank you for the kind remarks.