Pre-high School.

He is a good friend only.

Its second day, Bindhu is ready as usual to listen the stupid second story, I have no choice but to tell. After I left that school I never ever tried to meet Chaya or not kept any kind of correspondence with her, not that I hated her, my fear is in her view I had to accept Anish, which is highly impossible for me. When I told my mom she said it is a good thing that I shared with her.

My mom said further, usually girl in that age conceal such things from their parents in fear and she also told it is because that age makes teen people crazy and themselves they fall for each other like. Seriously I hadn't felt such things then, not even now.

"Don't be oversmart, this is not that you are a teen now and still be a bud in love. You are a grown up woman now, you started to feel something for guys that you are not sharing." Bindhu offended.

No I'm not, I don't know what is that thing hold me back whenever I think about love, its true I swear. Its okay, fine let it now, I'll start the next one, if you let me to continue.

I'm joined to pre-high school in city, now I'm extremely happy being with family. My little brother always mess with everything but its better to be in here than that jail. Today is my first day in school, my dad is busy so mom only took me to school. She said, "don't scare from anything and don't hide anything."

When I entered my class everybody is just staring at me like an animal in zoo. I don't dare to look over boys row, what if anything happens. The last incident left its scar so badly that everyday I fear to see boys. My class miss her name is Johana mom told, entered taking one more girl and a boy with her saying they are new students to class. She asked further " Is there anybody other than these two are new student to class?"

I raised my hand and she noticed, she called me so I went to her, she asked my father name, fee paid receipt and some more thing, she entered the three students name in attandance record. Later she distributed us in saturday's four groups. Saturday we have marchpast and exercise, for that whole students divided into four groups. Red group, blue group, green group, yellow group all group envy each other and every group has its own tag line, Red is danger, Blue God bless you, Green bathroom clean, Yellow dirty fellow. I got yellow everyone used to taunt me dirty fellow in the class, I'm new and looks little freaky to them.

As psychology tells, child is normal when it throws its bag after it came back from school, one shoe in rack and the another in somewhere, advert to all of it, I was so neat as a child. I kept ready my bag at night only, I myself pack lunch box, after coming back from school I polish my shoes first, then get fresh do my homework properly and keep my bag clean and ready for tomorrow.

"You are totally crazy, nerd and abnormal, aren't you?" Bindhu asked.

Whow, if being neat and clineliness is called abnormality means you have a dirty friend right now, she laughed at my words.

Its okay, let me keep on the story, it is like I ever not dared to talk, even to girls, what if they ask me to do some unlike favour, like Chaya did with me. I'm almost alone, nobody like to be friends with me and I fear. The other two new students are twins and they don't want other friend but I, so book becomes my friend. I read books all the school time so is named as book warm. Still I'm totally not satisfied with them, so I develop that reading to story books, every book make me feel happy. My days spent in class otherwise in prayer room, the class is ruined with groupism.

One day Johana miss said everyone to take their bag out of the classroom and she decided something to teach us a lesson for making noise. She decided to separate girls and boys, she arranged us in order that one girl and next one boy. This made me to scare more, what if I got two boys and I being in between. I'm lucky a little I got edgy place with twins, they are less bothering. Twins said hi to me, their name is Srusti and Srujan.

I'm good with twins, they always talk between themselves and I could concentrate on my class. One day Srusti didn't come to school that day, Srujan keeps himself silent that's a good thing, I don't want friends at all, I have got many friends in library. Constantly Srusti is not coming to school and Srujan is also giving me smile everyday. I have no wish but to smile back, afterall he is my bench mate.

Its been a week and 2days Srusti is absent, I'm feeling good with Srujan, he is funny and talktive, keep my company. He is always be in my side and be my escort if anyone taunts me. I feel secured in his presence, its 15th day Srusti come to school with much better face, Srujan said she has fever, I thought she might loosen her weight or something else but she looks awesome.

Hi Srusti how are you? How is your fever, she is giggling and said, " I'm fine". Srujan read confusion on my face so stopped her and a cracked a joke to chill my mind. He is a nice guy. We three become very good friends and Srusti too proved a very good friend. We used to play together, Srujan is always with us to protect, to take care of.

We have done our first accademic year in here successfully, our friendship become known to everyone in all the school. I'm so happy that I have two good friends and I'm loosing my fear for boys, I feel strongly that Srujan will take care of such issues if I'll have. One day they invited me to their home, with my mom's permission I have gone to visit twins. We have enjoyed with each other, they showed their room and Srujan is crazy about stamp collection, he has a good collection of stamps since the British rule in our India. Srusti is very much interested in knitting, she showed some of her hand made things, which are really cool.

That day I am not feeling straight like I do everyday, I have a slight pain in stomach a very different one than usual, I thought it'll be okay. I returned to home, Srusti and Srujan walk me home, its 5:30pm. I feel terribly wrong about my stomach, its messing more than morning, I told mom about it. She gave me some hot water putting in a bottle and said to keep on stomach where it is cramping. Its really nice, feeling okay mom, my mom looked somewhat scared when I said all this. I asked her the reason, she is really a good friend of mine, she helps me to figure out the things, this is the first time she looks worried.

When I asked her she said nothing but phoned my sister to talk, who has got married a few days before. That day mom pretended she is okay, but her tension takes the scar over her forehead, which is very visible to me. That day I slept in fear, thinking about her tension is about what? Again my stomach paining.. Should I say it to mom? No, she looked worried its okay, everything will be fine.

Its morning I heard my sister's voice I'm so happy and jumped out of bed to see her. My sister looks happy she wished me good morning, I told her about mom's tension. " Its okay, everything will be fine now, I'm here." She said.

Today is sunday so my routine gets very slow, I wished to be untidy atleast one day in a week. My sis came to my room, she sits by the side of me one hand on my shoulder. We talked a lot later she started some differnlent thing about me a little personal. I feel like shy, that she got, she told about changes in me physically, which I haven't noticed till she said that. She said be careful its nature and not harming, keep noticing yourself and inform everything to me or mom okay. Its a process that you'll change from girl to a lady, I mean you have the power to conceive baby in your womb and nourish it for 9 months.

I scrutinized myself seeing in mirror, what is that she said to me. I'm changed now that I get. I have large forehead than before, a big nose OMG! my lips looking pretty good I liked it. What changes I get she hasn't explained it to me. I asked Srusti about it next day, she just laughed and said one day you'll get yourself okay, don't worry its okay.

"Oh you don't know maturation in girl thats great honey, you are just a book warm, you proved it." Bindhu passed a comment.

Yeah, I wasn't then, its okay I got no problem from that, yes one day I get that change. I got to understand then about month's holiday for girls in last school and Jyoti's stomach ache. I thought she got pregnanat from her boyfriend, as I know she has one then.

The nature its pretty curious for me then onwards, I become more shy then before, now Srusti read my confusion over my face. Srujan keeps a good distance whenever we are together. Finally we finished our pre-high school. I changed completely now that I feel shy to see myself in mirror, Chaya is not getting much fatty but I, in certain places. I feel to someother thing to sit by the side of Srujan but Johana miss will get mad if we change our places.

Srujan looks a little changed now, I feel his eyes on me whenever I'm away from him, he secretly looking at me like nobody. One day he caught while he watching me, I don't know how to say him not to do it. I thought to say it Srusti, she is his sister, what if she thinks something wrong about me? I'm totally confused, after being caught by me he doesn't stop to stare, we are 15 yr old only, mom said love is a thing needed by everyone but it has to happen at a certain time and age.

One day I gathered strength to talk to him. Srujan you are my ever best friend the way you look at me is making me feel bad for you, I don't want loose a good friend so please stop doing that, if you keep on that thing I can't help it but to apart from you guys. "I'm sorry." he said in low voice and left the class.

Srusti asked me what happened? Why he left you like this? Come on tell me we are good friends, no hiding among us, do you remember our promise?

We made promise among ourself that we never get apart, we always stand behind with each other in bad times and we don't hide anything among us. Till today whenever she calls me she asks that, that is the only thing that I and Srujan hid from her. Srujan he is just a good friend for me but he had crush on me then, he said in college days I'm his first crush and he can't forget me forever.

"Hmmm there you rejected another heart so sad." Bindhu ended the story.