Chapter Two

Chapter Two
Hidden Desire

The sound of creaking chains haunt my thoughts as I try and clear my head. A continuous breeze passes through the air, causing the chains to jingle and squeal. My eyes open furiously as I walk over to where the sound came from and stare. I sit on one of the rubber seats, digging my toes into the warm earth. I then lean my head against the chain and rest.

There's no reason to be here, Cat. You could get caught and they might kill you or put you into custody to a family who is wrong, completely wrong. Cathrine, are you listening to me? The Voice continues to ramble as I listen to the hum of the wind. The trees then collide into each other, it's leaves talking to each other. Then a soft rumble of bushes moving along with the wind comforts my ears. Don't do this because of silly humans! Do you hear me, Cathrine? Do you?

Yes, I want to say, but instead I listen to the earth sing.

You don't need to torture yourself. Why do you want them so badly? I know you are here because of Caster, Cat. I know you want him, but why? That is what you are hiding from me. Why do you want Caster? He has done nothing for you, Cat. He only met you and greeted to you. There is nothing special there. Tell me why do you want this Caster boy. Why does he matter to you?

The reason why is not in my mind, it's in my heart. You will never understand because you are a voice in my head. You can't always figure me out. You'll never figure me out completely. So what if you know my thoughts inside and out, but you'll never find out the feelings in my heart. This is not for you to know, it's for me to figure out.

The Voice is silent and I am able to listen to the song in peace. A smile slips through my icy lips as I think about how I am able to figure this out on my own. Caster, I can figure him out including my feelings. How is it that Caster, of all the boys in Pennsylvania is able to make me notice him? Why him?

After seventeen years, this is the first time in my life that a boy is able to catch my attention. All I would see are people from female to male, black to white, Asian to Hispanic, but that is all. This time I saw a boy, his compassion and love towards a young girl. His ability to make problems solved. The way he's able to know something without knowing their true inner thoughts.

Tomorrow the sun will rise and I will see him, I will see Caster. I need to know him more, figure him out the way the Voice does, but in a more harmless way. He can find the answer to my problem. He can help me the way he helped Stephi. Finally, I can be saved.