Go to the Store

Another writing exercise story, still kinda silly.

Go to the store. Buy a flamethrower. Come back and burn those zombies to the ground.
Then burn your neighbor's house to the ground. Don't look in the ashes to find zombies, they're probably in there.
Go to your girlfriend's grave. Cry. Find some flowers from some other grave, and place them on hers, it's not like it'll be the first time you stole flowers for her.
Go home. Watch out for velociraptors on the way. No seriously, get the goddamned flamethrower back out and watch for them.
Okay, kill the velociraptor in front of you. The other ones will go away after you kill this one. Stop crying.
Good, now run like crazy. Hide in that dumpster. Ignore the guy covered in cocaine.
Mourn the death of the world.

Now go back to the store. Return the flamethrower. Tell the guy that those scratch marks were there when you bought it.
Tell him that he'll need it when the velociraptors reach this part of town.
Tell him that you don't need it anymore, not where you're going. Don't explain why, just take the money and walk out.
Go downtown. Relax. Don't worry about the raptors right now, they wont bother you.
Okay, worry a little bit, then run.

Go into that posh looking building. Push the elevator button. Crap. Wait, I didn't mean to defecate, that was just an expletive.
Start walking up the stairs. Keep going. Walk to the top. The roof door is stuck? Shoot it with your gun.
What do you mean, you don't have a gun? You should have bought a gun. Well, go to the floor below.
Walk down the hall. Try all the doors. Open the one that wasn't locked. Go inside.
Look around. Find a big window. Look out over the city.
Look at all those zombies down there... And over there are a bunch of velociraptors. What's the word for a group of velociraptors?
Nevermind.
Go grab a heavy chair. No, that one's too heavy. There you go, grab that one and throw it into the window.
Okay, try again, but this time do it right. Throw it into the window. Try to break the window.
Wow, they make these modern windows really strong, don't they? Nevermind.
I guess start walking back down. Wait.
Come back, I have an idea. Grab that microwave from the kitchenette. Now take that fire extinguisher and put it inside the microwave.
Put them both by the window and plug the microwave in.
Now, push the button on the microwave. No, not that button. Try the other one. Hmm... Maybe the popcorn setting.
Yeah, that worked. Now run away!

Good, now get up and walk to the open window.

Jump out. Damn, don't grow a spine now man. You have nothing left to live for. You might as well jump. Now jump.

Don't tell me to shut up, you shut up. I'm in control. Jump.

Good.

Now fly. Fly away.

Nice try, you almost made it.

Hey you. You over there. Yeah you. Go to the store. Buy a gun.