Meant to Live/Two Walls

A Story by Kayla

True story

My eyes snap open and I feel as if I'm blind; I can't see a speck of light. There's nothing there; nothing but me, my thoughts, and the darkness that surrounds me.

Suddenly I realize that I'm frightened, and with that I feel a tear escape from the corner of my eye, and it quickly rolls down the edge of my cheek. It's still blindingly dark, and I begin to wonder if I have eyes at all.

There's a sudden familiar sting of fear that rushes through my bones; the adrenaline eventually gets to my hands, which rip the blankets off of me. I felt hot, very hot; I felt myself start to sweat. I spring out of the bed and feel the cold hardwood floor on my bare feet. Soon after I get used to the cold, I feel my hands moving across the wall, which is also cold. I find out that my hands are looking for a doorknob to grab onto; to open and then to escape. There's life outside that door; there's love outside that door. If only I could find the doorknob to the world.

After about 45 minutes of searching, I realize that I can't find the doorknob. I would never find the door. I would never have life and I would never have love. Why?
Because I'm stuck.
Because it's dark.
Because... maybe I'm dead.
Or do I just feel like dying?

It was then that I knew that I was meant to die. I was never meant to be born; it was a common mistake. I was a common mistake.

So I decide to get back in the bed. I lie there for a mere 2 minutes, then I sit back up. I turn away from the wall and I get out of the bed. There's another wall. A surge of determination puts my hands to work, navigating the second wall. This wall made more sense. It felt lighter under my fingertips. This wall felt sturdy but escapable.

Sting.

My hand grasped the doorknob. I grasped the doorknob. I grasped the cold brass doorknob with pure and undefeatable confidence. And when I pulled the door open... Oh, when I pulled the door open... My heart knew who had led me to the other wall. As my vision came back; as my tears flew away with the soft wind; as I felt all of the love and all of the life filling me over the top...
I smiled.
I looked up.
And I shouted,
"Thank you".

It was then that I knew I was meant to live.