MEDITATION AND ZEN KOANS FOR SENIORS (JULY 24, 21)

 

The Retirement Coach by Mike Keenan

 

MEDITATION AND ZEN KOANS FOR SENIORS (JULY 24, 21)

 

It’s vital for retired people to remain nimble in both body and mind. Otherwise, we get too set in our ways, too fixed in our thinking. It’s important to be open to new learning. Thus, I’m back in yoga class. The eldest in our group is Joan who is 82. She is the star of the class.

Our teacher is keen on meditation, so I suggested that we study Zen koans to add a new dimension to our regular program of asanas, breathing exercises and relaxed meditation. A koan is a puzzling statement or a story, used in Zen to aid meditation and promote spiritual awakening. My spouse has often stated that I need awakening of one kind or another. In fact, not even the alarm clock in the bedroom seems effective in that regard. I confess that I missed a lot of morning classes when I was at University. What does seem to work well now is the smell of freshly brewed coffee. 

Anyway, in class we concentrate on one of the sayings of Zen masters of the past. They liked to test the enlightenment of their students through statements and dialogue that was deliberately paradoxical. The first collection of subjects or koans was made public way back in the 11th century.

From China, koan practice immigrated to Japan in the 13th century. A famous koan is: “What is the sound of one hand clapping?” I spent hours trying to figure that one out. Finally, I remembered once listening to a politician speak at a public gathering. When he finished, I tried to clap my two hands together but only one hand moved. Aha, I was on to something. It was only a matter of time before the eureka would occur just like Archimedes in the bathtub when the water overflowed or was that Pythagoras? No matter. It’s just an analogy.

            I will provide you with an example of a brilliant modern-day koan. Historically the Dalai Lama holds political and religious leadership over Tibet from Lhasa, a city in the People's Republic of China. Lhasa literally translates to "place of gods" in the Tibetan language. The 5th Dalai Lama ruled in 1642 and religious successors lasted until the 1950s.

Okay, the Dalai Lama walks up to a hotdog vendor at a Toronto Blue Jays baseball game. The vendor admires the monk’s yellow robes and asks, "What'll ya have?" The Dalai Lama ponders for a second and responds, "Make me one with everything." Get it? One with everything! Neat, eh? I suppose it would work just as well with “a hamburger with the works.” I thought that the Dalai Lama was a vegetarian.  I suppose that’s the true puzzling part of the koan.

            Another good baseball koan is “Who’s on first?” This koan can get tricky. Before you know it, you are totally confused. I watched two guys named Abbott and Costello try to figure it out for over seven minutes, but “who’s on first” led to “what’s on second,” “I don’t know” on third, “why” in left field, “tomorrow pitching,” “today catching” and “I don’t give a darn” the shortstop. Actually, it was quite amusing.

Tony, one of my retired pals, came over to see me the other day, and I thought that I would try out a Zen koan on him. I told him the one about the sound of one hand clapping, but he didn’t get it. He was puzzled. “Explain it to me,” he said. “Okay,” I replied but first I suggested, “Would you like a cup of tea.”

            “Sure,” he replied.

            I boiled water, threw a couple of tea bags into the pot, poured in the hot water, steeped it, and then started to slowly pour the tea into Tony’s cup, and when the cup was full, I kept pouring. Tony shouted, “Hey, it’s full; you’re spilling tea all over me and the floor; no more can go in.”

"Aha,” I said. “You see, just like this ordinary cup, Tony, you are simply too full, over-flowing with yourself. How can I explain Zen koans to you unless you first empty your cup?"

            By this time, Tony had tea stains all over his pants, and he was not amused, so he left. Of course, I thought that I had been brilliant, but obviously, my wife was correct when she predicted that some people are never ready for spiritual awakening.

            I was in the local public library the other day when a lady walked in and asked the librarian, "Do you have children's books?"

The librarian replied, "Do you have the mind of a child?" Wow, I was impressed. That was almost as good as “the sound of one hand clapping,” which I’m still working on.