Anxiety Attack Monologue

I was told to visualize myself in a calm state

A place I’ve never been before

I plead with my heart to be still

While I bicker with my brain

Visualize a calm state…

Every photo I’ve taken

Is blurred by my trembling hands

My penmanship, a series of harsh lines

I can’t make anything beautiful

Visualize a calm state…

I need sedation to sleep

Because I’m afraid

Of what?

Everything?

Reviews

[light and ashes]

Wow. This such an accurate descry of what it's like in my head when I'm having major anxiety. Great work. Enjoyed reading this a lot.

[poison&kerosene]

That is the beauty of poetry. It helps us feel less isolated. I am sorry to hear you feel this way but you are far from alone! Thank you for your kind words!

[light and ashes]

Awe, that's so sweet! Thank you!
You're welcome! :)

[PaintedBirdy]

anxiety is like fighting with yourself because other people have problems and take them out on you.

from the couple things i've read by you, you seem pretty cool and pretty real. i like people who are honest about their problems. which means you don't have to have anxiety around me. i just accept people's bad days because i want mine accepted too.

i like the line "every photo is blurred". a photo is like a memory so it means that memories are blurred by anxiety. i have always loved listening to intelligent girls who worry a lot, lol. i don't know why. i'll stop flirting and just end this with 'thank you for sharing this!'

[poison&kerosene]

Haha you're incredibly sweet! Writing has always been the only way I can express my problems. Being an adult with disorders is tricky because you have to keep yourself together no matter what. On here I can express all of that pent up fear and sadness. Thank you for your kind words and for stopping by!

[Ted Kniffen]

Anxiety can be a tricky thing to deal with. The littlest problem can set it off...it takes over making it impossible to think of anything else. What is there to be afraid of? Everything and anything and eventually...nothing.
Take care p&k.

[poison&kerosene]

It's hard to remember your body is falsifying the fight or flight instinct in those moments. I'm sure one day I will have a better handle on it. Thank you for stopping by Ted. You take care as well :)

[Alessander]

It's almost cruel when other ppl tell you to do something in a crucial state

Like if someone just comes up to a stranger and slaps them in the face, then you tell them "Don't get mad. Just take it" lol

I always remember a story, and tbh, I don't even know if it's true or not, where MLK got stabbed in the heart, literally, but instead of panicking (which would've made his heart pump more), he just remained calmed, and that saved his life.

So in my mind, I just think "if MLK got stabbed literally in the heart, and he was able to remain calm, then I can too"

Slow breaths. Vision starts to unfog. Don't pass out.

But, that's just me.

Anyhow, liked this.

[poison&kerosene]

Thank you for sharing that quote with me. I will try my best to remember that the next time I begin to panic. It will definitely stick with me. Thank you for coming by and reading my work!

[.]

This is a familiar theme to me; while not being prone to anxiety, i do know of others who suffer with the condition, and you have described the bickering battle between the heart and mind that unfolds at those moments very well.

I can certainly relate to the blurring photos.....I am in the running for the world's worst selfie photographer.....always blurred or in a constant state of shut eyed wakefulness in my shots. I guess you just have to calm the heart, focus the breathing and the rest will follow. Do that and everything in life will hold no fears.

Nicely described and very relevant for many. Well Done.

[poison&kerosene]

Yes! Everybody knows not to ask me to take their picture haha. Thank you for your kind words :)