Life as a teenage blender

Probably not my best work but it amuses me so I shall share it with you.

If I were to be an appliance I would be a blender is what I think.  I would be clean and shiny with metal edges and a lock lid.  I am beautiful and I never lose my lid (because it locks!).  My home would be on a marble counter-top in a smoothie shop.  I love the taste of smoothies.  I really love my job.  I would make delicious fruit smoothies and others would be in awe of the sweetness I created.  The fulfillment you get out of it is incredible.
               Some blenders look down on me and what I do.  They say I let the "man" control me.  They wonder how I could be so happy in a job where I serve humans and do it so well.  I try to tell them I get back in little ways and enjoy it here for my own selfish reasons.
                When I become angry my smoothies become become incredibly thick.  I would clink in amusement at their frustrations.  They could see the glistening, goodness, smell the flavor but no matter how hard they sucked they couldn't get even a small taste.
                 Most of the time though I'm happy and so are my privileged customers, my friends if you will.  Don't tell the other blenders I said that though.  It will be our secret.  I'm happy I live in a smoothie shop because that way nothing strange will touch my glistening blades, only lovely soft fruit.  My home is a safe place and I fear nothing while I am here.
                I've heard horror stories from my cousin Audrey Blenderia.  She tells tales of her blades becoming dull and listless, of her family putting chicken legs, thighs, and vegetables, within her long plastic body, to make disgusting, horrific concoctions.  The stories I've heard make my glass quiver in fear
                I worry about her for both her body and her sanity as a blender.  If things keep going as they are she may develop cracks.  Audrey is way too new to be getting cracks.  Her stories make me really despise her human family and make me grateful for the spot I hold upon the counter of this pristine and successful smoothie shop that I am lucky enough to call home.
                Soon, I hear my owners are buying a coffee machine.  I hear he's very handsome.  Apparently he's a dashing grey-black tone and as smooth as cream.  You know what they say once you go black you never go back.  I do worry though;  I hear he is a purebred coffee machine.  what if I'm not good enough?  After-all my father was a mixer; I'm practically a mutt.
                Oh, but if it does work we could be almost like the Romeo and Juliet of the Human world.  However, I've really been getting ahead of myself, nevertheless I will keep my buttons crossed.  I really must prevent myself from prattling on like a love-struck human girl trailing after her latest flavor.  After-all blenders mate for life.  Though daddy was a mixer so who knows what will happen. 


   

Reviews

[Deron Alexis]

Audrey Blenderia.......rich. love the coffee machine analogy...hell the whole thing was an analogy LOVED IT if i had to be an appliance i might be one of those spice grinders no matter how much u wash it it still smells like spice. I know that every element meant something special probably in another review i'll try an interpretation not usually a story reader but u made a believer of me