Life as a teenage blender

Probably not my best work but it amuses me so I shall share it with you.

If I were to be an appliance I would be a blender is what I think.  I would be clean and shiny with metal edges and a lock lid.  I am beautiful and I never lose my lid (because it locks!).  My home would be on a marble counter-top in a smoothie shop.  I love the taste of smoothies.  I really love my job.  I would make delicious fruit smoothies and others would be in awe of the sweetness I created.  The fulfillment you get out of it is incredible.
               Some blenders look down on me and what I do.  They say I let the "man" control me.  They wonder how I could be so happy in a job where I serve humans and do it so well.  I try to tell them I get back in little ways and enjoy it here for my own selfish reasons.
                When I become angry my smoothies become become incredibly thick.  I would clink in amusement at their frustrations.  They could see the glistening, goodness, smell the flavor but no matter how hard they sucked they couldn't get even a small taste.
                 Most of the time though I'm happy and so are my privileged customers, my friends if you will.  Don't tell the other blenders I said that though.  It will be our secret.  I'm happy I live in a smoothie shop because that way nothing strange will touch my glistening blades, only lovely soft fruit.  My home is a safe place and I fear nothing while I am here.
                I've heard horror stories from my cousin Audrey Blenderia.  She tells tales of her blades becoming dull and listless, of her family putting chicken legs, thighs, and vegetables, within her long plastic body, to make disgusting, horrific concoctions.  The stories I've heard make my glass quiver in fear
                I worry about her for both her body and her sanity as a blender.  If things keep going as they are she may develop cracks.  Audrey is way too new to be getting cracks.  Her stories make me really despise her human family and make me grateful for the spot I hold upon the counter of this pristine and successful smoothie shop that I am lucky enough to call home.
                Soon, I hear my owners are buying a coffee machine.  I hear he's very handsome.  Apparently he's a dashing grey-black tone and as smooth as cream.  You know what they say once you go black you never go back.  I do worry though;  I hear he is a purebred coffee machine.  what if I'm not good enough?  After-all my father was a mixer; I'm practically a mutt.
                Oh, but if it does work we could be almost like the Romeo and Juliet of the Human world.  However, I've really been getting ahead of myself, nevertheless I will keep my buttons crossed.  I really must prevent myself from prattling on like a love-struck human girl trailing after her latest flavor.  After-all blenders mate for life.  Though daddy was a mixer so who knows what will happen. 


   

Reviews

[roarke]

good anthropomorphic analogy here. This is a very good line: "After-all my father was a mixer; I'm practically a mutt." Don't keep repeating 'smoothie shop' give it a name, or express it in a different way each time you refer to it. Fun, original stuff here.

[Akshay Rawal]

Reading this, i was thinking what would i be if i were an appliance. I think I would be a wine- i take a lot of time to form my opinions and i keep improving them with time. My name would be Ak"she-rry"wal.

[Evyn Rubin]

That is an entertaining little story. You started with an original idea, then you maintained the character, with many details, throughout. Good job.

[JR Darewood]

you have the best titles.
i hope the buttons crossed paid off, and your coffee-blending man-of-your-dreams and you are happily plugged in to the same socket.

[daemok]

This is great! It was really amusing and fun to read. I really enjoyed it. :D

[chandlerl]

I LOVE this. It reminds me of Ben Looper's book , 'Stories for Night Time and Some for the Day' I think it's called. You do not give yourself enough credit my dear. Reading this is the perfect way to start my day.
Thank you.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

Your sweet! thank you soo much! I'm always honored when my work is compared to others who have gotten published. It makes me very happy.

[lissalovesyou]

Fantastic! I love the title and the topic!

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

Thanx so much glad you enjoyed it

[Woody]

Nice fantasy, Ms Dickinson. I love this type of writing, as you can imagine. I'm going to read it to my blender. I'm sure she'll love it.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

tell me her opinion ;-)

[Aehr]

This was a very entertaining read. I enjoyed reading it. And now that I think about it, I think that the coffee machine and the blender will be a very good couple. And I feel bad for Audrey.

[Akashi]

: ) Awesome. *thumbs up* : )

[Coyote Poetry]

A very entertaining story. I like how you made the blender have thoughts. I don't know. Some machines in the house get better treatment. My popcorn maker and old style percolater type coffee machine do get treated well. Thank you for the excellent story.
Coyote