Blood Lily

A poem I wrote about a picture I found of a flower; I included the picture with the poem

 

 

Blood red lily

You dangle crimson, fair

White and red

Dark and light

The yin and yang you share

Exquisite

For your nature

We shall take in turn

As we yearn

Staring at crimson petals

A bloody halo

Standing proud

Protrouding in a shroud

With a tiny, yellow peak-a-boo

Glimpsing from the crimson

Mosaic

Reaching out to be captured

Waiting for the yellow-black

Vampire

Waiting to suck, yearn for

Your divinity

Poor Bloody Lily

You don't know

and you stay open

Pretty and unbroken

Like a child's heart

Oh pretty blood Lily

Close up your fragility

For once my delicate flower

Please be smart

For we treasure each part

Of you

That makes your beauty tower

 

 

© 2012 Emily Dickinson Jr.  All rights reserved

Reviews

[Augustus]

What I really admire about this poem, is the progression from the descriptive to the metaphorical. The transition between the two is seamless. In the beginning, the reader can relate to the picture, and tries to look at it through your eyes. And then, you start weaving in the metaphors and make the reader turn inwards, trying to find human equivalents for every line. I love the way you project the beauty and innocence of the lily and contrast it with the "yellow black vampire". First, I like the contrast in colours: red and white vs yellow and black. Lovely visuals there. And I especially like the reference to the vampire, given that the lily is "blood red" in colour. Overall, the poem is coherent and thoughtful in its presentation and remarkably beautiful in its conception. Marvelous job!

[Adam Adams]

It's very fascinating that a flower - just a flower - inspired you quite deeply. Seemed, you'd flutter by its petals & the mosaic scents it brought to your ways. Nice shot. I guess, it's a sign of true writers who get so fast and easily inspired by the things their heart's surrounded with. It's what makes difference b/w average people and writers... writers capture things - beauty of world - in words where average people only praise 'em with words. Both are must and evocative at their own "stands" ... cos, ev'n a writer's been average first before getting jumped into the pool of such poetic majesty. Great job!

[L.Edward]

Wow! Every line defies expectation. Keeps you guessing. Many styles woven together to form this luscious word tapestry.

[lyricalprince]

beautiful poem! I really enjoyed reading this wonderful piece of poetry!

[Chloe]

Wooooooooaaaaaaaaaahh..... I'm in awe! That was a poem of exquisite caliber; one of your best. (in my opinion). Please write more like this!

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

lol I have to confess I wrote this purely for a ontest on a whim. :-D I didnt win but I dnt regret writing it. I'm rly glad you enjoyed it though.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

I just love this relationship between a child/ an adult and a blood lily, nice delicate descriptions

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

Why thank you! I originaly qrtoe it for a contest i didnt get first place sadly but i dont regret a minute of it

[Rogue]

To be honest, I wasn't sure of this one. Then I read it again and found myself quite fascinated by the mental images your descriptions give and the overall feeling you convey.

Quite an intriguing piece. But I really liked what I found within it.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

lol well I'm glad you changed your mind and liked it! :-D

[Blue Belle]

Love the description. It's fascinating.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

thank you! I'm glad you found ineterest in the piece

[Tina Kline]

A very creative piece. It does pull the reader in and with all the imagery it takes the reader on a journey, which ever one they choose, for the imagery has many different meanings as you wanted it to. It works nicely. I enjoyed this a lot.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

thank you tina :-) im glad you enjoyed it and had a good adventure lol :-D

[Hannah Jocks]

(:

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

ill take the smiley as a good thing lol