Waiting for Daylight

variant sonnet

 

 

 

Waiting for daylight

 

The clock has struck the midnight hour

and silence now hangs heavily.

Sad recollections overpower

my every happy memory.

 On looking back I clearly see

all of the errors I have made.

 foregathering and taunting me.

Aged veterans on parade.

The long slow hours of the night

 are not the best time to review

 your actions whether wrong or right.

You’re bound to take a jaundiced view

When you are tired but cannot sleep.

Experience does not come cheap.

 

16-Apr-08

 

http://blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers

Reviews

[Dawn]

i didnt mean to rate it as five wanted to put more, am a bit new to this yet sorry...

[Dawn]

This is a great poem, memories are worst at night, I know this too.
I dont know much about sonents and stuff, but i learn the more i read thanks..

[Poeticpiers]

part of the parameters of a sonnet is a rhyming couplet most often found as the last two lines

A good source book is essential if you are really going to study poetry
miller williams patterns of poetry or lewis turco's book of forms explain meters and formal patterns of poetry in detail You can usually pick up a used copy for a few dollars on amazon a rhyming dictionary is another useful investment But just holler if I can help ivor

rhyming patterns are usualle expressed as a.b.a.b.ab.ab
ab ab ab cc

[Wandering Bard]

It songs as though this guy is having a rough go of it. :) Hey, I don't sleep so well either when I remember things that I might have done wrong. And the ryhming, as in your other poem, flowed nicely, and I can clearly see the pattern you've made, but I see that your last two lines both have a ryhming word at the end. Your pattern throughout the rest of the poem is: ryhming word(1), word, rymhing word(2), (repeat). You don't have a word seperating the rhyming words. I'm new to the whole concept of poetry. Care to explain? (Sorry if you don't understand :P I'm not too great at that. But otherwise, it's a great poem. :))