Desert Rose

Estranged in a distant land;
Filled with sunburns and sand,
Pulsing on the parched ground;
Thumping with its unique sound.

Delicately laid at your feet;
Quietly strumming it's beat,
Pulsing a rhythm all its own;
Potently a passion is shown.

Pleading to be caressed, with need;
An organ, sobbing it bleeds,
Hungry for your love it pleads;
Maroon heart, the desert rose,
Waiting with patience at your toes.
 

Author's Note

the last stanza is a little different. Tell me if you think it affects the flow.

Reviews

[R E Tree]

The first stanza blew me away with the use of rhyming words that get me drawn totally. I can tell your writing skills have improved a lot. I compared this with one of your old poems and I can see how your writing skills have grown beautifully. Keep writing because you are such a great writer

[Michael of Gilead]

Maybe a slight tweek to the last stanza but overall very good and excellent imagery

[DamienHino]

the last stanza is excellent great job i enjoyed it!

[Katie Louise Hughes]

I like the title to this one, and overall the poem was great! How you compare a "maroon heart" to a desert rose... it's beautiful! Thanks and I'm sure you'll keep up the writing! :D

[G. Marie"floating on an..]

This poem is filled with poetic beauty. I think the last stanza was great. I read it over a couple of times and I think it's great the way it is. loved the metaphors and imagery here Outstanding!

[Emily B]

I think the last stanza might be improved a little . . .

[Ice QueenJen]

nice poem, Poetic. Maybe if you word the last line " with waiting patience at your toes." It would flow much better. Yet it shows a longing heart for a love far away, but is waiting patiently to be re-united with each other.

[kewlbluetiger]

Wow! You are really on-fire with your writing lately and this work shows how much you're in your zone. Lots of interesting imagery here that teases the mind sensually. I'm a fan as always.

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem. Thanks to the Army I saw many plants bloom in the desert. I spend five years between Fort Irvin and the Middle East. Nothing as beautiful as a flower blooming in the mist of the heat and sun. The poem is excellent. Thank you.
Coyote

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I like it as is... cause emotions never flow perfectly so neither should poetry.... your words speak so eloquently of love and devotion.

[The Analog Kid]

Nice imagery. The rose as a metaphor for the heart works well here within the setting. The last stanza: I would have kept it to four lines, but that's just how I write these. It doesn't affect the flow though.