Painted Scene of Love

Let me paint you a picture of love,
Of a moment of quiet bliss.
Where the heart rose out of the abyss,
Skyward, hovering in the clouds above.

Picture the sky fades from violet to black.
Bright orbs litter across the blacken sky.
A gentle breeze slowly floats on by.
The grass cool, when slowly leaning back.

Two people sit upon the grassy sea,
Immersed in the black velvet dark,
A long journey, they shall now embark.
Enjoying laughter, their own company.


Their laughter floats upon the slight breeze.
Smiles gleam, hidden within the purple night.
A silent love, encases a heart's delight;
As warm arms holding, do begin to please.

Fiery kisses planted on gentle lips,
While heated skin wraps around tight;
Twinkling star,s signaling all is right.
Love's hold on the heart longingly grips.

Within moments, love, consumes her soul.
Breath panting, a heart's yearning with need,
Kisses become frantic with breathy greed.
In that velvety night, a heart he stole.

The moon cast down it's brilliant light;
Illuminating the couple in the blueish glow.
Fusing lonely hearts, making them grow.
This scene ends, the never ending night.

Author's Note

the flow in this poem is different from what I have done before. I like the way it sounds. tell me what you think.

Reviews

[Lost, n'MT]

I like the A-B-B-A format (forgive me for I don't know or remember very many poetic technical terms). I don't feel you need to know them though to write, read, or appreciate poetry.

I think the rhyme scheme for this piece is very well done, and the imagery is quite amazing to perceive. I really enjoyed this one a lot, fantastic ending as well. Thank you once again for sharing.

[Black Snow]

Very interesting,I love romance poems...

[Ladysue]

I like this a lot. nice flow and wonderfully expressed. you had some really great descriptive lines in here...well done...

[FlawedByDesign]

The rhyme scheme works fairly well. You don't see much of ABBA, because it tends to create a disconnect between the A rhymes since they are not read in succession and the B rhyme interjects and breaks up the flow.

The rhyming withstanding, the imagery is really beautiful. You paint quite a nice "scene of love"

Nicely done :)

[Shalini Dinesh]

The rhyming was good, the painting of love was passionately and wonderfully done, a picture perfect!

[Frifthor (D^2)]

I agree with that the rhyme scheme here is definitely different from most of the other stuff I've read before. It gives it a nice feel though, as it keeps the reader involved more in the piece.

[La3uren]

i like the flow of this well done :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Because the night is made for lovers, because the night is made for lust...

yes the night can make the lonely even more lonely but the power and mystery behind the moon can intensive passion as well.

[HorrorMaster]

Very good poem, I thought it was good. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I like this poem. You told a very good story of love and friendship. Your description create a beautiful place and time. The complete poem was excellent. I like the ending a lot. We need to find peace and time to celebrate life pleasures.
Coyote