Labyrinth of Sorrow

The Labyrinth within my heart
Is causing great amounts of pain
The twisting and turning does start
With sorrow beginning to reign

Sitting by the quiet lake
As the moon shining down
Happiness I do have to fake
With people chatting all around

Midnight does approaches fast
With all the people now gone
Tears slipping down at last
As his memory lingers on

Lovesick for a gentle man
That has been taken away
Into his arms I quickly ran

Reviews

[alesuriko]

I found this poem is lacking in something... I'm not sure what but I couldn't connect to it like the rest of your poetry. It almost seems a little bland and it's lacking a good flow. It started off really nicely, I love the first stanza and your use of words, but after that it just slows down and isn't as easy to empathize with.

The first line in the third stanza really seems to slow it down because of the grammar issue of "does approaches".

The rhyme is nice though, and I like that the last line is only three lines... but other than that, I can't say this is one of your best.

[ICE]

This piece is sad and beautiful all at the same time. In the ends it seems that he died and she decided that she was going to join him.

[HorrorMaster]

Beautiful poem. *hugs at this poem* :D

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful poem. I like the use of language. A kind and sweet story. I like the ending a lot. A excellent poem.
Coyote