Pain of Difference

 

Preview… by Kasei the main character

 

          Okay, before you know me you probably think I’m a terrible person. Well, I am in some ways… but not really. I’m just trying to dish out the pain that’s inside of me. You wouldn’t live if you felt this way. Sure, I might’ve killed a few thousand people, burned down villages, and destroyed lives, but hey, somebody has to show the world what they do to their people, show the pain and agony of being different that almost nobody understands. What comes around goes around. There is no power in love. Love never conquered the world, saved a person, or burned down villages, so there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The screams of the dead echoed in my ears, but I did not care, It made me almost enjoy the feeling of power I got from It. As I continued walking in the white snow I could almost see even its white beauty cringe at my touch, not from me, but from It. Red flashed in my vision and I heard a heart beat and then it was gone, back in my control. It’s power melted the snow around me almost instantly, leaving a trail of where I had been, kinda like how I was in life, devastating, leaving a bitter touch.

I finally made it to my cave, the dark being bright in my vision because of It. Of course I could light a fire if I wanted to; It could with me without even using flint, or anything, making me remember…

 

 

“Foolish human…” It chucked. “You won’t live through this. I don’t know how you can finally hear me, but you won’t live since I will escape.”

          “Kill me, hurt me, and see if I care! I have nothing in this world to remember but hatred, sorrow, and pain. You’ll do the world a favor!” It was silent, as it thinking or taking back its last words, perhaps sympathizing with the broken soul in front of it.

          “What happened?”

          “What are you? Where are you hiding? Why are you following me?”

          “Ignorance is bliss, now, isn’t it? Answer me. What happened?”

          “My parents were killed when I was born, from you. You’ve done enough to me, why don’t you just kill me?”

          “So you do know me? What or where am I?”

          “I have no idea, but you… you’re red, with fire, and yellow eyes.”

          “Do you want revenge on what the world has done to you?”

          “It was you who did it to me, not the world.” Suddenly pain erupted in all my blood.

          “I was PROTECTING you, now why completely escapes me.” It thought for a moment. “We can become powerful if you let me give you the power, you can control it at your will.”

          “What do you want?”

          “Actually, I can help you with that same question.”

 

          I snapped out of the memory only to shudder about what it did next then unconsciously rubbed my left arm where it had burned a pattern into it and a symbol on the back of my hand. I decided that after all I had done today it was time to rest. I fell into sleep.

 

         

 

I was back in the village… a long time ago… it was perfect in its memory. I was walking down the street, my shoes gently hitting the paved road, my light brown hair flowing softly behind me, gleaming in the midday sun. Although everything was beautiful… this time of day was the worst. The children had adopted me in a way since my parents had died when I was little, I couldn’t remember how though when I was that little. The children were all at school, a place where kids with parents went to learn. I usually stayed and got a few scraps from other kids who felt pity, but not now. The streets were silent, but I could see people in the shadows of the porches, by the doors, glaring at me with utmost hatred. Suddenly running, shouting, and screaming was heard from behind me as a group of people came running towards me, stopping mere feet in from. Their eyes… they held such darkness… like they wanted to kill, but I was little, and did not recognize the emotion or things that people did, growing up on the street.

          “Can I help you?” I asked. “I like helping people.” It was the simple truth, back then. I absolutely loved helping the elderly and the entire village. What I could do to make the village better was my daily goal. “Perhaps I can help make the village better?” I said, suddenly excited.

          “Oh, you can, we so happen to have come for you to help us. Can you hold still and not scream for a while?” They asked. I was puzzled but nodded.

          “If it will make the village better.” I then realized the pain of being unwanted, disliked, hated, and the physical pain that I thought I would never endure, or live through. I was always bloody, bruised, and broken, and yet I always seemed to like how they beat me up every day, because “It made the village better if I wasn’t there,” so I always hoped that someday I wouldn’t be there.

 

          I woke up, suddenly bored at the thought of having to move. My vision, once again, like normal, flashed red, and I held still trying to keep It from controlling me as It pained me by burning my scars in deeper and I heard its heart beat, its gleaming eyes almost burning into the back of my skull. The moment it stopped I decided to get something to eat, my stomach was cringing with dislike of the emptiness it held. I went outside and I activated It in the middle of this forest.

          My usually almond brown eyes darkened and turned maroon as the scarred pattern on my left arm glowed red. My hearing and sight increased dramatically as I looked for my first piece of prey. It was sighted, trying to feed its family. The rabbit suddenly froze, realizing I had sensed it, then twitched its nose and stopped as incredible fire engulfed it, so quickly it didn’t have time to scream in pain as it died. I would’ve smirked, but I was bored, so I quickly picked up the cooked breakfast and turned it into what looked kinda like bacon, while trying to ignore It talking in my head.

          “Awwww, it didn’t even scream, that’s no fun,” its dark, deep voice whined without even a trace of sympathy. “I love to watch the light leave its eyes, don’t you like to listen as it screams out its final breath full of agony?” I ignored it and it grumbled something about me not listening, and then silenced itself.

          After my quick meal, I started leaving, while It whined about the chilly wind that bit into every crack in my coat. My mind drifted as I walked my familiar path to the waterwell, remembering.

 

          Their shrieks of pain made me smile as my rage turned into fire and everything glowed red and orange, my favorite color.

          I grinned, a sick cruel grin, knowing I was dishing what was put apon me to others. One of the children was on the street whimpering up at the glowing angry version of me.

          “Please, why are you hurting them? Stop it!” She said, crying as she ran and hugged my legs. She whispered quietly as she fell to the ground, the fire slowly engulfing her from my inferno of hate. “Please…”

 

          Drops of water suddenly fell from the sky, awakening me from my thoughts. Grumbling about how cold it felt on my usually heated skin, I grabbed a bucket of water from the stream and left, back to the cave.

          “What, we’re not going to kill anything more other than meals? That’s no fun at all, all you’re going to do is wallow in your cave of self loathing and misery and hatred from the world. That’s what you did yesterday, can’t we do something exciting today? You could use that hatred, and dish it out on all innocent people and children like you did a few towns ago,” It said, almost proud of my bloodlust.

         I didn’t say anything… like normal. I never talk. Instead, I created an orb of fire and looked in, the fire dancing on my eyes.

 

          There was the person, I was so determined to destroy. Towns of rubble lay behind me while I searched for him, knowing that I didn’t actually have to look. Those people always have to feel guilty knowing it would all stop if they came out.

          I looked at how dull his eyes had been since we last met, his green eyes had bags as well underneath. He wasn’t smiling, why should he? His black hair was still held up in a ponytail and his thin face seemed more frail than normal, along with the rest of his usually nourished body, now weak from lack of sleep and food.

          Why? Why did I set my entire mind to destroy one soul, out of hundreds that were previously destroyed? He was happy, loved, precious… I was nothing, but a container for It. How he was happy and believed in those happily ever afters… how can he believe that he can possibly defeat me, there are no happy endings, good will never out rule evil. I smirked remembering our first encounter.

         

          The flames were giving off joy, in a sick, twisted way. I was burning down a village, to make an affect on the world, so they will remember me and regret what they did to make me this way. A man stepped out and suddenly told me to stop, trying to put authority in his slightly frightened voice. I froze and turned to look at him.

          “How do you believe you can defeat me? What makes you so believe someone so carefree and joyous could even stand a chance. I have destroyed villages with ease.”

          “I am very popular and well known throughout the village. Perhaps their support will make me victorious.” That burst my bubble. He thought having the one thing I never had would make him win. He was liked, believed in, loved. I will give him a taste of pain, so he will understand. I will prove that nobody needs friends. Nobody.