The Blade

I was just thinking about some old stuff I wrote and I put this together. Tell me what you think.

The blade they say,

it crosses my vein,

The blade they say,

makes me insane,

The blade they say,

makes minds go wild,

The blade they say,

writes words in style,

the blade they say,

on my wrist,

The blade they say,

tight in my fist,

The blade they say,

slicing my arm,

The blade they say,

causing alarms,

The blade they say,

will make me die,

The blade I say,

will stop my cries,

The blade I say,

hates these lies,

The blade I say,

I love the blood,

The blade I say,

f**k all love,

The blade I say,

deaths in the air,

The blade I say,

my death is near.

Reviews

[Augustus]

Whoa! That's very dark and startlingly bloody and bold..... I like the way you repeat the line "the blade, they say" everywhere...it adds to the power of the verse. The rhyme is also easy and the lines are short and hence sharp, just like the blade you speak of...In fact, I couldn't help thinking that the poem itself was shaped like a blade.. long and thin but sharp...There is a steely negative resolve about them, which speaks of the softness of sorrow hardened over time...
A very compelling write! Good going!

The blade they say,
will make me die,

The blade I say,
will stop my cries,

These were the lines of the poem for me...the sharply contrasting views of "them" and "me" are portrayed forcefully in these lines...