Borrowed Minutes

"Love doesn't always get the chance to be anything other, but caught in the stolen moments." - Ees

Borrowed minutes and stolen hours,

These comprise our time together.

Fitting our love in between,

Life's commitments and demands.

Roles we play and parts we fill,

These are our public faces.

Never let them know the truth,

Of what has come to be.

We find the time between the world,

To fill the hunger of our love.

We face the world as separate beings,

To fill the strictures of our lives.

A simple wish for me this day,

For us within this world.

To have the minutes and the hours,

That our love deserves.

Reviews

[KaraKay.]

I like this((:

[Anu Biswas]

Such sweet thoughts stated so simply and honestly. I am so glad I joined this group of very talented folks. The poem is also so sad, its pretty heartbreaking.

[quinfinn]

i love the portrait of the rigors of life and the precious moments two who love can spend together...favorite line...."we face the world as separate beings to fill the structures of our lives" well done!

[Dr. Wood ?]

perfect length...perfect poem...Time is the enemy we cannot live without

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem tell a true story. Time is our most valuable asset. Funny how when we look back in time. We wished we enjoyed the good times more. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[PoemsbyPatrick]

Time is our most valuable asset, a lesson we often forget. Thank you for the review.

[Ees]

Nice work on this one. Love doesn't always get the chance to be anything other, but caught in the stolen moments.
I find it interesting how you present this- two people who live separately, yet love together when they get the chance.

"These are our public face."- I don't like the switch from plural to single in this line, it was too much of a holdup as I was reading the poem, so you may want to think about changing or reorganizing that one line.

good job

[PoemsbyPatrick]

Ees, thanks for the suggestion. Since I wasn't fixated on rhyming a change to the plural - faces - smooths out the line.
"Love doesn't always get the chance to be anything other, but caught in the stolen moments." I think I will borrow that for the description if you don't mind.

[Ees]

I don't mind at all.
Nice work.

[JustAnotherDreamer]

This is just absolutely beautiful. It's easy to understand, it's simply written, but it has such a deeper meaning. I like it; kudos.

[PoemsbyPatrick]

I got to the end and felt "it should be longer, say more", but when I read over it said what I had intended to say. So, simple and short it is. Thanks for your kind words.

[AleyshaRosa]

Wow, this poem screams what my life is rolling with right now. Thanks for sharing, I really appreciated the poem.
It had a desperate, yet soothing tone that was interesting to read.
Koodoos

[PoemsbyPatrick]

Shared angst and passions, one of the miracles of this site. If you are living such a situation I am sure that you recognize the desperation and desire behind the words. Thanks for your words, they are always precious.

[AleyshaRosa]

Anytime, Patrick
I always appreciate your poems