Hospice

I'm a student nurse and I'm about to see these sceneries... i will do my job as well as others can.

 

 

I let him rest
Not to cure
But to lead him
Into a place
Of endless light
Where everything resonates

Saving his thousand seconds
Preserving his lost thoughts
Breathing his anxious state
I fell symphatetically
Falling deeply,
Wanting to be his last

I read him
With his memories
Pasts and the unseen,
He doesn't listen
And barely breathing,
Somewhat dreaming

He closes his tired eyes
Move his head towards me
I can feel the tantrums
In his veins, it trembles
Still I continue reading
The sorrowful scenes

Then....

I heard him screamed
Like an agonizing pain
Felt deep inside his system.
Suddenlly, he opened his eyes

And...

In a split of a second, his voice...
Dissipates...
Fades...
Tears then fell from my eyes

Eventually,
I lost him...

Reviews

[Dalebear]

This is beautiful but sad as well
Keep writing

[Kara Emily Krantz]

this is intense. and wonderfully done, my dear.

"Into a place
Of endless light
Where everything resonates "

What a wonderful way to begin - the entire first first was perfect. And the flow was wonderful, the tension and anguish clear, and then the relief, yet sadness at the end.

Great job, m'dear

[Cynthia L. Cavett]

This was a beautiful yet sad poem. The part that really spoke to me was:
He closes his tired eyes
Move his head towards me
I can feel the tantrums
In his veins, it trembles
Still I continue reading
The sorrowful scenes

Feeling the tantrums in his veins is as if you can see and feel everything this person is going through. You feel their pain and their sorrow yet you still continue to read, hoping to give them something, being their last. Very beautiful.

[Shaun R. Kilroy]

Beautiful poem. I really connected with it even though I have no experience with hospices or dying people. Some parts did confuse me though, gramerically:

"I heard him screamed" - I'm not sure if the use of 'screamed' instead of scream has a purpose, but if it does it is lost to me. I have the same question about a passage a few lines higher, with the use of "move" instead of "moves," unless you are moving his head, which wasn't really clear.

This part was really effective:

"Saving his thousand seconds
Preserving his lost thoughts
Breathing his anxious state
I fell symphatetically
Falling deeply,
Wanting to be his last"

[Shaun R. Kilroy]

Beautiful poem. I really connected with it even though I have no experience with hospices or dying people. Some parts did confuse me though, gramerically:

"I heard him screamed" - I'm not sure if the use of 'screamed' instead of scream has a purpose, but if it does it is lost to me. I have the same question about a passage a few lines higher, with the use of "move" instead of "moves," unless you are moving his head, which wasn't really clear.

This part was really effective:

"Saving his thousand seconds
Preserving his lost thoughts
Breathing his anxious state
I fell symphatetically
Falling deeply,
Wanting to be his last"

[Cat O'nine]

well written, and as a medical student already hitting the ICU units, it was scarily accurate. loved it, but wont be able to read this one again. just a little too close to home darlin.

[Creepy Swine Guy]

I am reminded of Jesus' rebuke of his Apostles when he said "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?"

As with the Apostles, there is nothing you can do to help. But there could be comfort in knowing one is not alone in the most unknown of times.

[Troy Baham Jr.]

man that's gotta be an awful feeling. i can't even imagine watching someone die right in front of u. even though u did everything u could u still can't help but feel sorry

[Jesse Dunstan]

this is a very powerful piece. only poetic expression could capture the emotion and intensity of a scene such as this. i could be wrong but it might need a bit more fine tuning. its great though!

[Yira Simone]

It's ironic you would ask me to read this sense a family member of my bf is about to recieve hospice service at her home. She is dying of cancer now. And as a caretaker of my sickly family memebers of my own, I understood each line and could relate in ways maybe only you could understand. This was heartfelt and I'm grateful the world has caring souls like you. Your patients are very lucky. This was very good. Thank you for asking me to read this poem.

Catrina