dream

perhaps in the world of dreams
in the realm of closed eyes
and the slightly open lips
of sleeping children
there is a place
where i can become myself
in a homage to all i have known
and who i have lost
in memories i have locked away
and lovers i have forgotten
there is a world
where i become i
and there is not a single person
who can stop that from becoming
my reality

perhaps in a place
a time
of deep green oceans
and crystalline sands
i am but simple
unblemished
unintelligent
unknown
a single cell organism
unheeding of all else
perhaps this is where
i become
who i was truly meant to be
 

Reviews

[Alton]

When you dream, you are one with yourself. Should you retain enough of your normal conciousness during or just before drifting downstream, you can discover SOOooo much about yourself. I keep a little notebook by my bedside for the purpose of recording potent bits of thought that only come when your ego is left on your pillow and your imagination is floating among the stars.

Great poem, the intro grabbed me, the substance made me stay for the ride. I love the dreamy quality of the lines, the lack of punctuation, I can barely help from yawning while reading it (that's supposed to be a compliment, btw :P)

[speakingcolors]

i really like this. sometimes we just have trouble being ourselves. we have trouble even knowing who we really are and what we should be. you did a really nice job of painting a picture for the reader with your words. loved it.

[PianoandPage]

i really enjoyed how you opened this...

"perhaps in the world of dreams
in the realm of closed eyes
and the slightly open lips
of sleeping children"

and how it sort of repeated a theme of casting off all societal affectations and going back to utter simplicity and loss of perceptable form. very cool.

sounds lovely actually.

[Enigma]

Wow! A brilliant idea well-presented. I agree, dream-world is a place where we can truly feel what we really are. A beautiful feeling it is, isn't it?
I loved it!! Fantastic Write!!!

[darkgurl]

Very well written here, well presented.

[RHEA CROSLEY]

Insightful but I think your going to be so much more. Thanks

[Rambling Prose]

A beautifully written expression of being true to yourself, even if only in our dreams.

Nicely done...

[Hedra Helix]

pip, pip, pip. see, this is the stuff i miss on a daily. you're so you.
potency

[kurrupted]

KURRUPTED- (speechless for a moment, but then he gathered momentum and exclaimed) wow! what a piece well penned.

[Jon]

Love this - stumbled accross it and almost immediately became like one of the children you describe with slightly open lips - a nice simple, yet deep piece that draws you into that dreamworld of what might be.

Top writing!