Jitterbug

I wrote this poem exactly 1 year ago. It's my first poem written in English, which belongs to the "rambling" series.

Another day went by

I wanted to write personal stuff again

About you and what shouldn’t be called us

The little things you did,

The touch from you that I was melted into

Like a robot once was clicked,

I leaned on you and your little smile

How could it be possible

Your headache made me want to buy you pills;

While your presence made my breath hard

Don’t you realize I was torn apart

Between being a caring woman

And a nonchalant “girl-like-boy-friend” ?

Maybe someday when I meet someone new

He would see these files on my computer

He would want to read out of curiosity

This thought scared me a bit

Isn’t it a little too personal ?

He wouldn’t be allowed much to his dismay,

It’s a little too personal indeed.

My stuff about you should remain unsent, unknown

Even when I stop longing for you

Still you, and the way you made me feel

They’re all personal.

Like a name I wish to chant, when I’m down

No one needs to know.

Author's Note

I wrote this poem for someone I had lots of feelings for last year. It belongs to a series I name "rambling" including 4 poems, which this is the first one. English isn't my native language, and although I've learned it for 7 years, I've just tried writing poem recently, so constructive comments are very much welcome.