4. Deceased

Two police officers arrive....

4. Deceased

PC Dedbeat pulled up outside the house that was allegedly swimming in blood according to an emergency telephone call, and sighed. His partner was also a PC, this time Amelia Pincher, and when he looked at her he had to grin because all he really wanted to do was pinch her somewhere. He knew it would bring nothing but trouble onto his shoulders, but maybe it would be worth it.

But he was decent enough not to even think of mentioning it.

“What do we know?” asked Amelia.

“It was an odd call,” muttered Dedbeat, “probably from a nutcase. We get enough crank calls to drive an officer like us mad! From what I can gather an old boy rang in saying his wife had gone missing and there was enough blood on his kitchen floor to drown a cat in.”

“Sounds gruesome.”

“Let’s go and take a peek. It may be nothing, but on the other hand…” he let his voice trail away.

“It may be something.” Amelia finished his sentence for him. She wasn’t fond of men who allowed important thoughts to blow away unsaid, and this might prove to be important.

They closed the car doors and were at the gate of the house when the front door opened and a smart looking young man came out.

“Officers, I’m afraid you’re wasting your time,!” he called, “My old man thought he saw a lot of blood, but he didn’t. It was just a puddle of beetroot juice, and the silly old fart should have known what it was because it was him who spilled it last night. He should never have alerted busy folk like the police force when there are important things for you lot to do.”

“That’s a relief, sir,” smiled Dedbeat, “and I’m glad he’s alright”.

But PC Amelia Pincher thought that was an unforgivably lazy reaction and she frowned and then said, “We’d best take a look then, sir, dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s as my old Inspector used to say. Then we’ll be off and leave you in peace.”

Dedbeat scowled at her, but he knew she was right. And when they got back to the station it was odds on that they’d be asked by the DI if there was anything in the matter worth following up, and without looking they’d have no idea how to answer. So, “yes, sir, we’ll just take a look,” he said as if he was in charge, which anyone who knew him would be sure he wasn’t.

Just then a young woman from the house next door came round the corner from the back of her house. She looked worried as if something terrible was on her mind.

“May I have word, officers?” she asked.

“Oh, that's who I call Mrs Nosey Parker,” growled David Rozelle quietly (for as you will have guessed it was he who was discussing a confusion between blood and beetroot juice), and he added “round here we’ve learned not to take any notice of anything she’s got to say, what with her having her nose in everybody’s business.”

“Dedbeat, you check the blood and I’ll see what she’s got to say,” said PC Pincher, taking charge..

“OK,” he nodded, relieved not to have to do any thinking for himself, “best to be thorough.”

Amelia went across to Tania Beaufort, and smiled at her because she was about the same age as herself, and she looked troubled.

“How can I help you, miss… er…” she asked.

“I’m Mrs Beaufort. But people call me Tania. And listen, I’m a bit worried about what’s been going on in that house. Let me explain, and I’d best start at the beginning. They only moved in a few days ago...”

Then she went on to describe the antics of David Rozelle the previous night, frantically digging a hole so deep she couldn’t help wondering what on Earth he wanted it for. “He was still at it when I went upstairs to bed,” she concluded, “and he’d stripped down to his underpants, probably because he was sweating so profusely.”

Then she went on to describe his acerbic attitude towards her that morning together with what she thought were lame explanations for what he was doing.

“Potatoes don’t need so much loose earth in order to grow properly,” she said, “after all, he must have gone down the best part of six feet! And he suggested that the older woman might fall in the hole if he didn’t fill it pretty quickly. And when he found out that the older man, the one he refers to as his father, had phoned the police, well, he was most unpleasant from what I could hear. once the two of them had gone indoors,”

Amelia nodded her head. “Well, what you’ve told me might end up being useful,” she said, “it’s clear that the young fellow’s got quite a few questions to answe, and I gope my colleague’s asking them.”

“It’s just that I was really worried and I’m glad to have got it off my chest,” replied Tania.

PC Pincher nodded and returned to where Dedbeat was making his way out of the house next door.

“Well?” she asked, “how much blood was there?”

He shook his head. “It was what he said, just a spillage of something red. A puddle like you might get in any kitchen. Might have been beetroot juice or just about anything that colour. Didn’t look like blood to me, anyway. But what convinced me was the old guy who made the phone call. He was fast asleep on a sofa, didn’t move a muscle being out for the count. The young man, a teacher so he’s decent enough, said he starts drinking at the crack of dawn and is out for most of the day. Not a way to live, if you want my opinion.”

“Really?” asked Amelia, “you sure he was asleep and not, you know, deceased?”

“Deceased? What would a bloke like that be doing deceased on a fine Sunday morning like this one?” asked Dedbeat, “I mean, it just doesn’t make sense.”

“Maybe not,” she murmured, “but maybe that’s why he telephoned us. Who can possibly tell? Come on. I’ll report back to the DI while you get your nappy changed!”

© Peter Rogerson 23.05.24