A DAY TRIP TO TOMORROW

A time traveller returns with good news

“I thought I must have travelled to the past!” gasped Davey, climbing out of the Professor’s weird machine and suting himself down. “I thought the machine was playing up and I’d get lost somewhere in Tudor England! Everything was so chocolate box and pretty!”

Professor Schmidt shook his head. “Not possible,” he murmured, no trace of his Teutonic ancestry obvious from his accent. “I perfected the guidance system. You must have travelled into the future. That’s the only way you can have gone! Did you video it?”

Davey nodded. “Of course I did!” he grinned, “there was lots worth videoing, too. It was so peaceful, so green, fields of golden barley, skies so blue you’d swim in them if your could… the future! And the air smelled so sweet, so clean… And the people! I’ve never met such happy and contented people in my entire life!”

“And pollution? Rising sea levels? Everything we’re afraid of?” asked the Professor.

“All sorted, or so it seemed,” said Davey. “And they’ve got politics sorted too! None of what we get today with lies and more damned lies by self-serving egotists! There’s a special punishment for leaders who behave like we know politicians can!”

“Now that sounds positive,” murmured the Professor. “What do they do? String them up until they scream for help? Fill them with Truth Serum? Or something worse?”

“More than that!” replied Davey, “There’s an acronym based on the last Yankee president of them all!”

“Why him?” asked the Professor, wiping his spectacles on a soiled cloth and shaking his head when he saw what he’d done.

“Well, he got caught out badly, apparently. He was an inveterate liar and he simply told too many.”

“They’re all like that!” grinned Professor Schmidt. “I’ve had some dealings with them, I can tell you! They promise one thing and deliver another whilst telling you you’re getting exactly what you asked for, when you know damned well you aren’t!”

“Well, apparently sorting that out led to more harmony and peace and tranquillity that there’s ever been in all of history! It was the politicians causing everything bad and disgusting. And the scientists, people like you, sir, were finally able to get on with their work unhindered by ignorance and political platitudes.”

“That’ll be the day!” grinned the Professor “What did they do?”

“It’s easy to remember,” said Davey. “Can you remember the last President of the USA?”

“The very last?”

“Yes! After him things just had to change.”

“He was a bloody nightmare, but nobody knows what happened to him. He sort of disappeared off the face of the planet! They reckon he got some floozy into trouble and ran off because the girl’s father was an ex-wrestler after his blood.”

“Well, I found out what happened to him.”

“You did?”

“I did. When he was caught he was taken to a world court. And people were so fed up that he was made an example of and the punishment he had to suffer was put into law as what any politician anywhere on the planet will have to suffer if he gets caught deliberately lying.”

“And what’s that?”

“There’s an acronym to help you remember. It’s Testicles Rutted Under Massive Pressure...”

“What’s Rutted mean in this context?” asked the professor polishing his glasses on something clean.

“You don’t want to know. You really don’t. Trust me,” sighed Davey. “But that’s what happens to them if they lie to the public They get TRUMPed! And you’d never believe how much better the world becomes...”

© Peter Rogerson 20.11.16

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Your story of widespread wishful thinking is one of the best election commentaries I've read so far. Your central point, as stated in the final paragraph but also nicely alluded to all along during your story, is so sadly lost on all those making harsh judgmental one-sided commentaries on this stinking political stew. Your story is so refreshing by comparison, delivering truth with humor and imagination.

[Peter Rogerson]

Thanks for your comment, barleygirl ... and I loved reading your own reflection on the foolishness of uprooting woodland in the name of progress.

[alanwgraham]

Good peter. Your story is light hearted fun on a scary subject. I think trump has inspired a few of us. I wrote a story called the watchers on trump you might like. The hit squads might be out for us!
Cheers,
Alan
PS I found your profile interesting - what a nightmare losing all your stories!

[Peter Rogerson]

I'll take a look. I enjoy being light-hearted as long as the subject matter isn't too scary!!

[alanwgraham]

I think this one is a bit scary - ha ha!

[emmajoy]

Will never make the diplomatic corps - am laughing so much! Apart from the smooth flow of language in your story and truths enclosed throughout - sprinkling the path as the tale moves along - that ending is, let's say, more than appropriate.

Mind you there are other names that could be used.. if time allowed - and no doubt it will!

[Peter Rogerson]

A momentary reaction to events ... it seems that the chief function of politicians in the 21st century is to be exclusively liars...

[emmajoy]

.. and to make utter fools of themselves whilst trying to make fools of their people!

[Peter Rogerson]

Exactly. But we let them.