my virus

this is one i wrote when i was seventeen so please pardon its generic and cliche : emo teen theme :)

you're my natural disaster 

the monster in my closet 

the thing i fear the most 

i am rigid with fear at your overwhelming presence .

i feel the melancholy disease you bring with you 

you're an epidemic to my soul .

you invaded my space 

you corrupted my system , the virus 

you planted within me is growing 

you're a disease to men .

go away you incurable pest! .

you've broken me 

this virus has corrupted my morals 

it has destroyed my cognition 

you trojaned my processors 

you crushed my rural village within 

so what is next do i pass you on to the next victim ?

Author's Note

i wrote this , after i found out this young lass was using me and cheating on me lol .

Reviews

[Travis Gibson (poetic h..]

Profoundly deep!

[Sirius King]

strong words, really great style

[Peter H]

thank you very much mr. raymone.

[Sirius King]

your welcome :-)

[TrimarcoRansome]

The dilemmas of love, so unpredictable and mind blowing, never knowing what to do next....I like your style!

[Peter H]

thank you very much :) for the review :)

[FJ Davis]

In some ways, an extremely mature perspective for one so young.
The poetry also appears to be surprisingly advanced.
Overall, it seems to me, H, you acquitted yourself quite well.

[Peter H]

thank you very much mr. davis

[The Girl That Let You G..]

For 17 this is amazing! Wonderful work, love the metaphor

[Peter H]

yea most seventeen year old emo kids had these thoughts about their ex gf;s lol :P thank you so much for the review :) i appreciate it

[Muse]

People have a funny way of infecting us with all sorts of emotions. Like a virus it can destroy and ravage the host. The ending felt like a plot of revenge?

[Peter H]

not really i just felt sorry for the next guy she bared her fangs into :)

[Chris]

Sometimes a person just isn't ready to settle into a serious rrelationship...

[Debbie_Philly]

Very deeply felt.... hate when some one cheats.... the worst feeling... its good we get to write it out ! Great piece!!

[Peter H]

thank you very much ... i'm best friends with that girl nowadays so its all good lol

[Debbie_Philly]

Well thats good :)

[Wondering Mind]

one of the best ways to learn about something is to get it(pun intended).
i enjoyed the metaphor, and i hope you didn't pass anything bad along to anyone :)

[Peter H]

you're very humorous but i assure you i was never alluding to any std lol .

[Wondering Mind]

lol...I'm sure you weren't...I hope!

[A. H. Pinley]

I wanted to believe you were talking about a woman, but you convinced me that you were talking about a computer virus. A virus that infected the hard drive. Taking over the mainframe and corrupting your files. Good write!

[Peter H]

i was talking about a woman MR.Pinhely .......... surely you must have noticed i used the virus thing as a metaphore lol but however i'm sure you're just playing anyhow thank you for the review my friend :)

[A. H. Pinley]

The way my mind works is, it wrestles with itself as to what it is reading. It runs wild with images and ideas as to what's taking place in the writing. Good work!