SKELETONS

 

I wonder

What imperfections lurk

Beneath your surface

 

You’ve done so well

Locking away

Those skeletons

 

You don’t like to digress

Prefer not to reveal

That part

 

Is it difficult to keep them there?

Hidden from the world

Carefully placed out of sight

 

The thought

Of letting them out

Would be too frightening

 

What if

You were the one

Judged

Author's Note

I wrote this about a couple I know that seems a bit too perfect - I always wonder, "what's wrong with them?' - feedback always appreciated- thanks for reading!

Reviews

[FJ Davis]

Mr. and Mrs. Goodie-two-shoes kinda bother you, eh?
Aside from the fact that you obviously have serious issues, P, I can say that "Skeletons" is extremely impressive work and makes an excellent case for sticking your nose into this couple's business--or, at least, into a couple of their closets.
I keed; I keed!
Perhaps, they act a bit weird when you're around because they're both in love with you. Don't get negative, now; just tryin' ta help.

[Persephone]

Haha! It does bother me! I know I have many many issues - but isn't that what makes a great poet??
And who am I kidding, of course they're in love with me...I mean who wouldn't be?
lol thanks for the thoughts Frank!

[Rick Puetter]

An interesting piece.

The vision of skeletons is so powerful. It immediately connects with our psyche. It's almost as if we're culturally prepared to entertain such a vision and such an intrusion upon our lives. Why is that?

i have also written a poem about skeletons--see http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/rpuetter/311037/.

This was a powerful vision, Persephone. Greatly enjoyed with high marks!

Best regards,

Rick

[Persephone]

Well thank you so much!

[Donnab1116]

i really like it because i see people that look too comfortable as if they practice lines, just too perfect its fake. sometimes you wonder whats beneath the surface. i love how you described it

[Persephone]

Thanks so much for reading - Im glad you enjoyed it :)

[Suavis_Umbra]

wow , we're all stained , some are just too scared to show it , l love that , amazing stuff ;)

[Persephone]

Thank you :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

We all make mistakes and we all have a dark side... yet we judge others for theirs, I think that is a way of try to deflect attention from our own.

[Persephone]

Very true! Thanks for reading!

[Havoc08]

haha...I love this one. I do not have a problem with my skeletons. I do not care what other people think nor care if they judge me based on them. I think some people have too much anxiety over them that they live very gloomy lives..this is well done..

Jimmy

[Persephone]

Thank you!

[Samuel Dickens]

I think I know the type you mean. Time has shown me that you're right to be suspicious. I'm not the greatest at reviewing poems, but I see not a thing wrong with this one. You get your message across with just enough well-chosen words.

[Persephone]

Thank you!

[Pól]

I think we all know people a bit like that- but the good news is that apparently being judgemental makes a person totally miserable.
I liked the poem v. much- it was, hmmm quirky, i think thats the word.

[Persephone]

Thanks for reading!

[Stanley Wilson]

great poem reminds me of our curious side

[Persephone]

Thank you!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I can so relate to this. So well portrayed. We always see others as being 'perfect' but behind closed doors.......or if their masks slip?

[Persephone]

yes, thanks for reading :)

[Persephone]

All what is lovely hidden, made you to write this beautiful questionmarks, it's great! Skeletons are great! It is life dear mermaid. It keeps you busy at least. Why should there be anything wrong with them? (assumption?) just because you have no vision on it? (just wondering) that's the whole point, Work on your clairvoyance.... and you will get answers... and I mean real clairvoyance. Not moving stuff... ;) or vodoo.... Loved this one!

[Persephone]

Haha I will work on that! Thanks for reading! :)

Remember you can, You're great, and if I didn't saw, I didn't wrote my review like this... :) So I believe you have it.

[Persephone]

Thank you so much!