solo

this unbearable heart I stumble with

do I need that warmth of companionship?

I do own a vast array of vintage military cold weather coats

do I question my judgments?

they ask

each exhale becomes tested and notes are taken

here

I wonder if this sideshow of my emotion will fill a book?

as usual there claims a twist

on rested eyes her pixie beauty continues to haunt me

those glaring dark stairs I've fallen down

(you may shudder at the loss of such beauty)

for I do

yet

cursed on a gypsies path

I need pain

I need the verge of tears upon my brow

I need the silent dream of holding hands with a ghost

soon to realize I'm only clenching harder

I

without moving

signed a wavier away allowing the whipping to commence

but

even as I plea to no-one

I'm baffled at my self pity

this want of self loathing and solitude

so yes

her glaring pixie eyes still haunt me

her feathered skin

and that razor smile that stabs me like like needles as the above noted exhale is observed

Reviews

[Wanderlust]

Impressive, there is an odd structure of rhyme to this, as though it is disjointed and it fits very well. It does sound like the person is being haunted, ironically by something that, from your description, sounds harmless and innocent.
In this line:

"You may shutter at the loss of such beauty." I think you should change "shutter" to "shudder", that would make it flow better. I also like the mention of the vintage military coats.

[Dani California]

This is one of the better pieces I've read here. Unique style; intensely emotional and self examining. Makes me want to leap off a bridge really. Such painful longing, but also the longing for it to be painful. Nice.

Great read! Thank you.

[EmpressPoetess]

very nice. very creative writing style and a deeply moving subject.

[Legion]

Depressive longing. Well done.