dream girl

demo song

tapestries sway
she wore the clothes of the times
on this brilliant day
and in the melody of rythme
she twirled and pranced a tip-toe dance

from the notes of a harp

the village celebrated
for their history books
and folklore


falcons soar
on the tears of a bagpipe
I adore
you


amoung the fruit trees
and weeds
I saw you place your eyes
in the corner you have grown
accustomed to the light
these days have been to hard


falcons soar
on the tears of a bagpipe
I adore
you



oh dear king
grant me one thing
grant me this pheasant girl
she eyes me in the fields
near the stables in the corridors
the English name of some great lord

she's an ode sung in a weak pub
by the farmers and families and by the evening grub
her puppy dog eyes and peppered nose
i keep her locked up so no one knows

you can tie up an angel
but don't let them find
that you clipped the wings
of one so divine

Reviews

[Seriana]

"you can tie up an angel
but don't let them find
that you clipped the wings
of one so divine "

Of course a dream girl. One that is cagged and lost, perhaps. This brings my mind's eye to fantasy-land, very much like in the sci-fi/fantasy novels I enjoy so much. Of a place and time of old, when things were more simple in life, and the promise of a happy ending endured. Love it!

[Tara Jean Olson]

I I BEGAN TO READ THIS CASUALLY,
AND THEN THE CONTEXT REALLY BEGAN TO SINK IN (THE 2ND OR 3RD STANZA)
I WAS INTRIGUED.
SO I STARTED OVER, AND YOUR CONCEPT IS VERY ORIGINAL!

[Angel's Lady]

you can tie up an angel
but don't let them find
that you clipped the wings
of one so divine

OH HOW I WISH THAT I HAD WRITTEN THESE WORDS! How very wonderful!

[WordMaster]

The structure of this poem is very creative

The pace and word selection adds to its enjoyment

Nicely done