Through His Eyes

just a poem i started at 3ish in the morning ;)

He makes me miss a place that I have never been
He paints a picture with his words
And then he draws me in
I smell the salt, feel the sand,
See the gray-blue sky
It’s as real to me as oxygen
When I know it through his eyes

He takes me to a place where I can breathe so deep
He pushes the whole world aside
And wakes me from my sleep
I smell his scent, feel his hand,
see his hazel eyes
They're as real to me as oxygen
beautiful as a thousand skies.

Author's Note

I am working on making this into a song as well, but the chorus i have is atrocious, any thoughts on what should go in the middle? :)

Reviews

[Georgia Gypsy]

This is lovely, paints a beautiful picture with the words!
You have done an awesome job of touching the senses which is always a plus (though not always easy to do).
I think it would be great as a song. When you add to it let me know!!

really enjoyed!:)
kelli

[Hope]

SONG!!!! I think it would be for an acoustic guitar and a single vocalist, that's of course just my opinion

[Blanche Bubble]

Its very pretty and it isn't sad at all! *read & reviewed the wrong poem*
It has the same feel as the song "Almost Lover" by A Fine Frenzy and "Ordinary Day" by Vanessa Carlton. You know? Kind of wistful and dreamy. I saw a painting by Monet the other day that totally made me feel like I fell into a different world. But then again I'm addicted to Lewis Carroll, so I might be interpreting the feeling of the poem in a skewed way.

"They're as real to me as anything" I don't like that line. I think you should compare the feeling to something more specific, because in my silly mind, "anything" is pretty general. I'm imagining that its more real to you than a plate of spaghetti with meatballs. Just a suggestion though. Take everything I say with a miniscule grain of salt.