Loss

I have been sitting by the window until my brother had left this morning. I was luck cause I was able to get all my chores down early. I am worried that something may have had happened to my brother. He knows how I don't really like him taking too long. Since our mother past, father, well he is in the war. I knew that it could just have been a long line at the well, but that still didn't make me feel any better. The night was slowly starting to fall when I finally heard my brother's footsteps coming up to the house. I was so glad when I heard him come into the house. 

"Brother were where you? I thought something had happened to you? Why did it take you so long?" I asked

"Rose I am sorry I worried you. I was getting the water like I had told you this morning. Yet I also had to pick up some other things. Anyways the reason why I was not home sooner was cause the mayor had some people come over to me to bring me to him. I have to go to the war. What they said is the men in the war right now are getting slaughter to the point they need to get more men to help," said Ash

"Ash you can't go. You know how I feel about that. How am I suppose to live on? What will happen to me? You can't leave me. Mom is gone she had past away. Father is gone in the war. You are the only family I have left. Please don't go," I said

Ash came to my side and gave me a hug. I knew there was nothing I could say that would make him not go. I knew he was going to go even if I didn't want him to. There was no point in trying to beg him to not leave me. All I could do was hope that he would make it back alive along with father. 

"So Ash when do you leave?" I asked

"I leave tomorrow morning," Ash said

I left my brothers arms and went to the kitchen to start making dinner. I knew this was most likely going to be the last time I will see him. I didn't want to have him remember our last time together with us fighting. I was just about to get the food out when I realize I should ask him what he wanted.

"Ash what would you like for dinner?" I asked

"Rose, I want you to make a meal that would please mom," said Ash

I started to get the food and everything else I need to get to make our meal. I could feel my knees shaking and I knew that was not a good sign. I started to let the silent tears roll down my face. For I was going to loss everyone I ever cared about and there was nothing I could do about it. I didn't even know when my brother had moved  until I felt his arms around me. That was when I allow the tears just to start to stream down my face. I turned around and punch his chest a few times. Then I pushed away from him and then started to cook dinner. 

That night we ate dinner in silence it was almost like neither one of us knew what to say. After dinner I picked up our plate and went to the kitchen to wash the dishes. It didn't take long, however when I went back into the dinning room. Ash just sat there staring off into space. I had no clue what he was thinking about, but I figure it was something I really didn't want to bother him.

I quiet open up the front door and then closed it behind me. I walked to the barn it was the only place I had felt safe after my mother had past. I open the barn door and close it behind. The slowly made my way up into the loaf and walked to my miss match of a bed. I crawl up in a ball and just cried. I could not do this anymore. I knew what really happened to our mother. I had a feeling that our father was not coming home for he was dead. I was afraid that if my brother left then the men who killed mother would come back to me. I didn't know how I was suppose to deal with this all. I was truly scared. 

 I didn't even hear my brother come into the barn or even when he walked up to the loaf. It was not until I felt myself being picked up and put on his lap did I realize that my brother was there. I looked up to him with my tear stained face and just balled again. I shoved my face in to his chest and cried he rubbed my back and held me as I cried. 

When I woke up the next morning I was still in the barn, but my brother was no where in sight. I knew that he had left and there was a good chance I would never see him again.  I walked into the house and saw that he had left some gifts for me. I got closer to the table and saw there was a note also. 

Dear Rose, 

I want you to have a very happy birthday. I promise you that when dad and I get back we will have a proper party for you. I am sorry I didn't say good bye this morning, but I saw how upset you were last night and didn't want to do that to you again. I want you to know that ever chance I get I will be sending letter to you. Please know that I do love you sis. 

Love,  

Ash

I broke down crying for I could not believe that my brother actually remember my birthday and he was going to write me. I looked at the gifts and made a promise with myself. That they would stay wrapped until my brother and father came home.