does it not hurt?

doesn't an absence so tangible its presence is felt hurt?

doesn’t it hurt when someone you
were once friends with fades
into oblivion?

doesn’t it hurt when someone
you love or once loved
disappears from your destiny
into the depths of history;
effectively dies and creates
a strange dearth of something
je ne sais quoi
doesn’t it bother you at all?

doesn’t it hurt when
someone whom you thought was the One
or someone you think is the One
suddenly ceases to be
ceases to exist?

you, who were once my all
who drove my day and renewed my night -
albeit unwittingly, for it was but
my mind at work, self-destructively
painting images that could not be -
have nearly become like a celebrity
an object, a figure, a shadow
a thought
a passing thought that visits when you’re in need
a passing thought that puts you in heat
a passing thought that burns with no limit
and scalds and destroys and pulverizes
and after that passing thought materializes
and has done what it was supposed to do
it does what it is now supposed to do
and passes, leaving
an awkward space, a void that gnaws
that reminds you of your futility
of the fruitlessness of your thoughts.

and then you are reminded that the certain You
who has diminished Yourself from your life
still exists in that of others’
still breathes and lives and stands
still makes a sound and talks and laughs
and this knowledge steals your self-lived joy
and corrupts your fantasies
and brings back memories of
What Could Not Be

doesn’t it hurt when you love someone so badly
someone whom you are so afraid of loving
someone whom you love involuntarily
doesn’t it hurt when someone’s presence could matter so much
that absence lingers and tugs at your heart
an absence tangible enough to sustain your need for desire
an absence that fills a hollow with nothingness?

a nothingness that your life clings onto.
does it not hurt?

Reviews

[Harrisen Viator]

I really enjoy this poem, because I think a lot of people should be able to relate to it. The repetition of "doesn't it hurt" really helps to drive home the thought that you are trying to put out there. I can really feel what you wrote, it feels real.