poems float

poems float

A Poem by paul

poems float
on the water
fish swim by

unseen unaware
thinking the water
is air


thoughts invade
clear minds
like storms on a 
sea

thinking of you
not thinking
of me

© 2011 paul


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. the story of my life ... but i couldn't have said it so perfectly ... the remarkable intensity of profundity, depth, simplicity and utter genius that you transcend with each poem you write is astonishing ... yet i wish ... more than ever before ... for you ... for em ... for christopher (isolophobe) ... and everyone else who is suffering ... and me ... the thoughts of someone who is thinking of us ... may love win ... just this once ... may love last ... just this once ... may the after taste of life not be bitter ... and may our soul mates find us rather than hangout on facebook and twitter ... or worse still ... live as if nothing happened ... when we did happen to them ... when they happened to us ... here's to you, coach ... and here's also to the rest of all of us ...

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

And in so few words, you convey...everything.

Posted 13 Years Ago


This is an entirely original comparison - I love your light touch with words and how you allow the image to build up piecemeal until it crystallizes in the reader's mind.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Perfection. The double space between the two sets of stanzas because the two thoughts stand alone in the poem clouds you created. I love the water as air - that will be a keeper in my mind.

Posted 13 Years Ago


oh, but I was thinking of you

you are never very far away

Posted 13 Years Ago


Love it- the second stanza especially was wonderful. It struck gently, but niggled in and came out strong. Really interesting piece- great job. :)

-Coral-

Posted 13 Years Ago


Wonderful. Short, but very piercing.

Posted 13 Years Ago


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em
- absolutely magical words from you - yet again - paul!! - you're a master - at outdoing the astounding brilliance - you show us the elements in a new light - and every little thing - that the rest of us walk past - unable to even comprehend - sometimes - ignorant enough - to not even know - that comprehension is needed - you tell us - like no one else could - there is a new world - in every poem - in every line - and in every word -
- and 'storms on a still sea' - i just want to echo serah's 'ohhhh' - over and and over - :) -
- may this be the - the one time - that love lasts - amen to serah's prayer - :) -

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I liked the flow and gentle rhyme within this piece as it lent to the 'calm before storm' feel

Posted 13 Years Ago


How are thoughts can surrender themselves to another and still they are our thoughts..a very interesting write dear friend.

Posted 13 Years Ago


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.
. still sea ... ohhhhh ...


Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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14 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on December 31, 2010
Last Updated on January 2, 2011

Author

paul
paul

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