The morning light

The morning light

A Poem by paul

dreams like sunshine
come to visit in the night

like strange movies
in my sleep

as shy as
my muse
in the morning light

© 2010 paul


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Reviews

what really scares me
is the dawn
when i hold the sun down
and refuse to let it rise
and all because i've finally
forgotten what you look like
when you sing


rambling again!!! what's with the 7 lines!!!


Posted 14 Years Ago


damn, you are good at construction...i've always been terrible at that...your word pics are burned in my brain...

Posted 14 Years Ago


Wonderfully done.

Posted 14 Years Ago


good, like a japanese koan, you are waiting now for realization, "strange movies in my sleep".... good placement in the poem to give it impact. THe way the two middle lines work makes the poem work,.

Posted 14 Years Ago


i finish reading the poem, and i make a click sound with my mouth, a sign to say you hit it on the head. seven lines was all it took to express a moment of sleep and a moment of waking. i really like the way youve divided the lines, it gives the poem a soft flow - like that of the first light of the day - and also gives the reader just a taste, one flavour to hold in the mouth and suck on for a while, taking in its lingering sensations. this definatly has an impact and due to its simplicty and short length, stays with the reader for a while after reading.
thanks for letting us take a walk past the inner sign posts and leaving us with a fresh bright taste in the mouth.
nice!

Posted 14 Years Ago


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...
. beautiful! ... seven lines ... seventh heaven ... cloud nine ... dreams definitely are strange movies ... we just have to do time to figure out ... in retrospect ... if they were based on true stories or not ... :) ...

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Stunning first two lines, I had to pause before reading on.
"dreams like sunshine
come to visit in the night"
I love those dreams of sunshine.

Posted 14 Years Ago


yes, i like it, stirred, but not shaken

Posted 14 Years Ago


I love it :D
Such a great poem =3

Posted 14 Years Ago


Oh, I love this!
An excellent structure and poem, each line leading perfectly to the next!
xx

Posted 14 Years Ago



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12 Reviews
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Added on August 11, 2010
Last Updated on August 11, 2010

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paul
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