An Ugly Duckling

I remember the first time I saw him

He was laughing with his friends

My breath was caught

And only a yard of empty space separated our bus windows

I stared at him with wonder

Was this me falling for another guy?

Would this only be a crush?
Would it be more?

 

 

For days I watched

He teased Rachael like there was no tomorrow

Through those windows

He talked to my friends who had sat next to me for years

But not me

I was still invisible

I’m always just a quiet bird

Then I thought about everything

 

 

What was I thinking?!

He was a year older than me

What chance did I stand against the beautiful girls he went to class with everyday?

I was an ugly duckling trying to compete with beautiful swans

 

 

But then

One day

We made eye contact

Only for a second, but still it was there

My heart was filled with joy

But still

What chance did I have?

They were swans, I was an ugly duckling

What little chance I stood.

 

 

He said he didn’t like me

But we somehow ending up dating

I was overjoyed

 

 

But then

He stopped calling

No texts

No messages

No talking

I knew what was coming

I could have prepared my heart for it

No, I wouldn’t

 

 

The words stung

They hurt more than any physical pain

When I asked

He told me that he had fallen in love with someone else

I asked why he had ever loved me at all

I got back the most surprising answer

He told me

He thought I was beautiful

 

 

Through my tears I laughed

He needed his eyes checked

I was an ugly duckling

Not a beautiful swan

 

 

I forgave him

I couldn’t stay mad him

He still owned a place in my heart

Between the love and the hate

He was just there

My friends were angry at him

But not me

 

 

Months later

On facebook

I saw that he was online

I sat there at my computer desk

Debating

Should I talk to him?

What if he doesn’t want to be friends?

 

 

I took a deep breath

And finally put my fingers to the keyboard

But stopped

I couldn’t help but notice something

He had been the first boy to ever call me beautiful

I smiled and typed hello.

Author's Note

this was written for a class in school. Hope you enjoy it. :)