Part one-the discovery

Tip tap tip tap, the bothersome rain goes. Even more annoying than the last time i remembered, although the coo of the birds that dwell around here remains oblivious to my aloofness, can i still not anticipate the years to come...

These nature noises fill my brain past the journey home from detachment, a brick building  of three floors for nothing but to lament my troubles and stare into space, forgetting all the crowds of teenagers scurrying down and up the halls, chattering excitedly, going to and fro from class, all in their own personal joy.

School's easy enough, just listen, absorb, and demonstrate. Getting good scores is the plan, usually just in reach. But falling asleep in class, going over the delicious stories on your phone, is enough for me to live my life plainly as it is.

Escaping over some muddied spots and puddles, flitting through the forest shortcut, as the dead brown colored leaves and clingy overgrowth hover like still ghosts around my peripheral vision, I heave a sigh and swing my sports backpack from over my shoulder, facing the tender spirits of home. Home was a towering brick house of 3 floors, with an open sun room, sun basking furniture and the rest just flows smoothly as a well designed spacey living room.  Not really isolated from the rest of the population, but there is somewhat a mile from the nearest town.

Before, life used to be good, Life used to be amazing. Animals talked to me.

Parents lived in happiness.

I lived in happiness, with her.

I used to fantasize being forever with her, enjoying her laugh, being in her company, teaching her how to ride a bike, not that she'd need it anymore, and kissing her upon her pate with those honey words of good nights.

She was always there for me, there for my problems, there when no one else was, and so was I, caressing her in a strong embrace, holding her when she need to cry. Ravened dark haired twins of destiny, there was no need for her to go.

Until, until...those hateful tendril hands of the drops of dark death kissed upon my warmhearted sister of exuberance and guess who won?

The darkness swept over her immediately, encasing her body, shrouding it in its deadly poison and she was left forever a porcelain doll in the useless chamber surrounded by her stagnant beauty.

The phantom-like smoke floats away from the kitchen in clouds of grey. The supposed warmth of the winter fireplace has just started to breathe, cough and gaggle. Soon, the mist in the air cools and weather outside has its own plans to carry out. Cold wind blows in from the unattended windows, hissing with anger. Where were my parents, coming home at 12:00? As soon as night crawls in, i will go to her burial place again, as i always do, to honor her as the child who'd lived to bear happiness upon everyone and only lived thirteen years of her short life, gone just to give away the sorrow for us to collect at least that is how I see it.

They were sorry. Dad got over it. Mom got over it. I didn't. I almost did, though. How could i? A careful brother of 13. At that time it was everything was okay. Death seemed to be on the other side of the world, where I'd have to crawl a sun's length to get there. How could a simple car accident separate the destiny of us two twins? Kate and Kyle. A beautiful pair.

If, if i could, i would have gone to help her build that tree house like we'd planned. We'd thought of it many summers ago, but never quite gotten to it.

Clutching the handle of a cooking pot, a tear silently rolls down my cheeks. 2 hours of loneliness has passed. Dinner was the thing left waiting. Making chicken broth, yellow rice and lettuce, cooking in general was the activity i prided myself in.

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A normal day without her. A day to myself. I echo in my head. This is good. Life is fine. I'm healthy and she is at rest. She'd want me to live, to breathe, and live contently.

Punched right in the heart. Left the face unharmed. I wasn't even with her. Some jerk drove too fast, swerved right off the lane. Don't blame him, my  mother said. Let it go, my dad said. And we all lived like that....

Jerk called 911 after the collision and she was sent to the hospital immediately. Alive halfway. Dead half way. I could only regret that she'd been in someone else's car and not with me.

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Sunday, a sunny day.

The sun pouring into my bedroom ignited me. I loved the sun. As the books piled on, Kate's death four years later, and with a PC that i bought with my hard earned money, there was nothing i loved then going for a stroll down the park 1 mile from my house. I hopped out of the tangled mess i made on my bed, rinsed out, grabbed some jeans, t-shirt and jacket and went downstairs to make breakfast.

"Hey honey." My parents are a reasonable couple. Just the best i'd ever have.

"Sup." My low voice rang out.

"How was your first week of school?"

"Senior year's going great, mom."

"Hmm..." My dad's broad shoulders appeared down the stairs. “Do i smell freshly made coffee?"

"You sure do, honey." She replied with sufficiency and love.

And there i went out the door...

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The breeze of the autumn air consumes my lungs. I inhale with such capacity that literally my chest puffed out in a weird form. Light, gusty morning drafts. I am anticipating this kind of weather. It helps me think. And clears my mind. Walking the same monotonous pattern, i gain pleasure in contemplation and found pleasure in enjoying myself as the sun rose.

As i neared the deserted playground, the one i used as a landmark as to the distance i'd overcome, i notice a slight change in the location of objects. In an eerie sense, the outside world felt disorienting, out of place, adrift. It's queer, since the 'no loitering' sign was supposed to be on the opposite side of the monkey bars, where the side walk was, instead of laying on the ground like a lost frisbee.

 Oh well the matter, i shrug and walk back around the pond to face the path under the leaf trees towards home. One may think any strange happening counts for something, but it's just a normal day...

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"Your name, please." The voice of a stern teacher who expects only what she asks piques from the hazy classroom of 30 some students.

I lift my head from the burrows of my jacket arms. Since i sit in the back, i usually just "sleep" when in reality i'm actually on my Android.

I hear Buddy's whistle and Todd's voice echoing. "She's so hot." Typical of these two bold jocks. If you don't notice, Buddy's more hotheaded than others and Todd's more dumb than most.

If anything didn't catch my attention, i lift my head from the program i'm testing and gaze where the sightseers are looking. There she was, a princess in ...school uniform. If anything, i'd have admitted the awes to a scanty dress or prostitute costume, or something! And unlike all those lovey dopey romance stories, she doesn't even sit next to my seat. She sits in the 3rd row, just 2 rows away from mine, right after she surprises me with her sweet voice saying, "Judith."

Hearing the name, i immediately plummet to heaven. Her voice was brilliant. As she stepped closer, i caught just a small glimpse of her almond face before she turned around into her space.

If you're me, then you like watching people from behind, no? Her hair was tied in a ponytail, typical of most good students. Once in a while her hand moved intuitively to quickly capture the phrases of the teacher. Then suddenly she stopped.

38 minutes of instruction passed and her back remains unmoved. This puzzles me. Sometimes people shuffle, but no sound comes from her movements. She leans back calmly as a sniper and looks straight ahead. When i have stared at her for a full ten minutes and Brittany from the left is getting jealous, it finally dawned on me that she must be a bit shy, or is this her way of sleeping?

The bell rings for 4 dings. Everyone shuffles towards lunch like fish. I was about to go with the crowd until i was stopped upon my feet from the way Judith held herself. One hand covered her face. I don't dare to approach her. I reckon crying girls are left better to be consoled when their tears are dry. With one glance at the teacher who wasn't going to do anything, I sighed exaggeratedly so that she'd turn around.

And like magic...she did.

Her pink puffy eyes met mine and for an instant they sparkled, at me, before they escaped towards the desk. I swear they sparkled.

Perhaps a napkin would help. I searched for my jean pockets. They were empty.

"You don't have to..." her mouse voice interrupted my thoughts. It was like a clear spring, yet also a windy whisper.

All i could imagine was "PINK".

Face pink, nose pink, and eyes pink. What so I’m just going to let her stand helpless like this? I leaped out of the napkin devoid room and retrieved a stripped box, without a beat, before i handed it to her. "Here, you should really use some."

"I'm fine, okay?!"

I do not understand women's hormones these days, but she seems to have transitioned, especially the way her voice rose. I lowered my eyes as she captured one with her hands and used it to wipe her nose.

Maybe she thought being fine was not using napkins.

I noticed her crisp white shirt, navy tie and collar, commonly stripped skirt, bare shaved legs, down to her white socks and high heeled open toed black school shoes, all wore with great suitability. She must be about 5 foot 7. A pretty girl shouldn't be crying so hard, i summarize.

Well, if there's anything i could do...or else i'll go eat my lunch.

So i disappear.

Without a warning i silently leave the room, conserving the important factor of privacy.

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It's so hard to walk these days. I swear kids are getting more and more in need of going where i'm going. It was today again when i commenced upon some things strange. It was the mailbox. All the red hooks have disappeared. I smirked, as if i'd chance upon them somewhere else. It wasn't funny. Someone or something was doing these nameless pranks. I was afraid it'll carry on longer.

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The bell rings for a new day in school, Tuesday. Not that i'm particularly uninterested, since i look like i'm not all the time, but academics is just so easy. Multi variable is easy, AP Lit doesn't require the tiniest effort. Gym is the easiest. I know my kind of person would be guarding someone very close but ever since my sister died, i've ceased my protective shield and there remains an immovable space under my light feathery wing where she'd left me. I'd been broken, unable to cry and most hurt of all. My parents knew what was in store for me. It was fate for us to be separated. Some move of the higher power.

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I find her in the gym. Before i had her in my English class, now i see her at lunch often going to the gym. No, we don't have any other classes together. She is a strange one. First she tries to eat pizza with a fork, cringes at the unfamiliar taste, throws it in the trash and goes to buy some more food. Then, she tries to persuade everyone to eat healthy foods. I bet she even went to the teachers to sign a petition to change school lunch, which could sometimes be junky. And the strangest thing was, she was always cheering someone up, including the other team. Her sympathy was kind, her kindness was abundant and her heart was forever in gentleness.

This is the first time i follow her to the gym. During previous times i just watch her grab her bags. She thinks no one's looking as she stalks her way into the gym no one uses, but i am always watching.  A tail of raven black hair, slender figure of 17 and a faded black bag which hides in the crowds. But i see her, and perhaps through her.

I find her on the ground, reading. So cute..Just as i stepped through the door, something amazing happened. She tilted her beautiful head towards me and asked if i needed a hug.

What was i supposed to do? I'm not one of those self conscience boys who wonder if their breath stank or have BO or whatever. I was pretty chill and of course i checked beforehand.

As i gaze into those big sparkling turquoise eyes, the entire universe was spread before me. I was a contender to her favor. She was the doings of my soul.

I noticed it was probably not something she'd ask of any commoner, but i was to be her confider. As she walked towards me, i prepared my arms for a warm protective hug on my part. I wanted to shield her momentary from her troubles, whenever she furrows her brow or feels deeply worried, i wanted to give her that protection.

She wrapped her slender arms around my chest and i pretended not to think as i did the same, just lightly around her back. I smelled her hair and it smelled like peaches. Hmmm....

The ephemeral embrace lasted about 1 second. Seemed like she needed a hug too, and for one to gain one from a satisfactory guy was enough to liven her spirits, our spirits.

I could feel it too. The way she tried to disregard the connection between us like it was nothing. Like walking on water, we were both propelled into a state of great pleasure. She only reached to my chin and yet...

everything felt so right. Two broken pieces of a whole.

I'd always thought it would be my sister and only my sister who could fix me, but i was so wrong. If i could let go of her that easily, it would be with Judith, my new happiness.

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The next Monday, i saw her at lunch. She brought her own lunch and was eating it in the cafeteria. She sat next to a clique of cheerleaders, oblivious to what they were saying. Cheerleaders often have girly habits, but some, some look really tomboy. I know Margaret. She's always rowdy and obnoxious, which is why some of those members ignore her. The most fitting of the cheerleaders and their captain was a slender teenager of good proportions, heart shaped face, long blond hair and she was nice. I could go talk to her right now and she'd listen. Her name was Leslie. But what i didn't contend with was the way Trayton the bully was slowly crawling over to Judith without warning and who knows what he could do. As he snatched seat after seat, i realized i couldn't just stand there and watch, however, i knew she could handle herself and wouldn't want me there. So Trayton the bully gave her his phone number and left. I blankly watched, hidden in that cafeteria corner as Judith smiled to herself and stuffed the paper into her backpack, like she'd been expecting him.

Judith made new friends recently?

Being the stalker i am, i kind of followed her home that afternoon. Stupid of me, i then bumped into her. Here's how it went:

Judith the lovely maiden walks home everyday. So do i. As i spied her gleaming shadow over the last of the school buildings i grabbed my backpack and hastily fell instep with her two paces behind. As we passed the traffic light, i hid myself into a dozen of faces and bodies and walked on ahead past the glaring sun and under a blanket of greenery. The shade felt soothing and since that now it simmered down to just the two of us, i had to be careful of my footsteps. But what i was to mind was not important. What i really wanted to do was talk to her one on one. It's been a week since that time in the gym. And now that the gym is rarely ever empty, she changed to eat in the noisy cafeteria, as if the huge spaces protected her or something. 

"Oof!" She lifted her head to look at my face. A day without her hair band was an annoying day with hair, I took it. Apparently she changed direction. "Kyle?" She remembered my name. "What are you doing here?" Hiding her surprise but i knew she felt me coming. I'm not that good as to conceal my airs. Those words spoken out of her mouth were mixed with jubilation and anticipation.

I observed her, really did, like those times in English class when she'd first arrived, i was happy to find someone who felt some exotic yet familiar, no feelings of off the mark like from the other girls. I was content to be in her company, to be with her and do things for her. I saw yet the same inquisitive almond face two inches away from me. Up close i thought our connection was even more intimate and this bond was happening again. When she's gone, it's like the connection has faded, but more of her and i feel satisfied, filled and brimmed with her feminism.

She noticed and back away quickly. We were both left to silence unless I say something. "Hey, how's everything?"

She nodded and replied that she didn't know. Then suddenly a piece of paper fell out of her bag.

She looked embarrassed at the sight. I picked it up and handed it to her. "You were helping him with homework?"

"Yeah, it's the only way so that he won't bully me."

I sighed. "Did you tell anyone?"

"Haven't thought of that." She touched her wrist. "I have a plan though." Her eyes lit up again. "Lately, I’ve been practicing for the music competitions. I want to go to music school. You should come!"

Her plan...?

"I'll get rid of him. He won't bother you again."

"Thank you so much!" I didn't know how to respond because at that second i noticed a slight cut at her neck. It looked like she'd been shielding it all day. Cuts look ugly on innocent girls. I was anxious to probe her. But i asked. She replied something incomprehensible. All i heard in her thoughts were: sacrifice blood.  And then i went back home.

 

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I couldn't sleep that night. No matter how much i tossed and turned, even drank some milk, i still couldn't feel that numbness over my eyelids. I could still picture her face, even commenced to drawing it. Bright turquoise eyes, concentrated look, and her raven dark hair which was probably even fuller than mine in volume. As i finished the last strokes of her sketch, i was once again awake for a long time.

If i could, and it's not past 3:00 am, I wanted to talk to her privately. I already memorized the curvy path that leads to her house. Without second thoughts, i sling my backpack over my shoulder, grab my bike and ride. Those shadows may appear under my eyes, but i wasn't sleepy at all.

I would wait until morning but as i was waiting under that big oak tree her window neared, i could hear her footsteps as she lifted her window, surmised that i was there, and no more until she arrived near the main door.

"Kyle, what are you doing this late hour?"

"To find you." I stood up. Her pink nightgown embodied all the fresh incense of sleep and i regretted waking her up. Her hair was once again covering her neck.

She yawned and said, "Why don't you come in?"

"If that's what you're comfortable with." She took off her slippers at the door and beckoned me towards her bedroom. Inside was wild. Her room was neat but still retaining a taste of bewilderment, like she's been practicing moving the room items around.

"You haven't slept..."

"It's fine. Is your cut okay?"

"This?" She touched the left side of her neck. "Sacrifice." I heard something triumphant in her tone.

i shook my head. "I don't understand."

"If i do magic, i need to sacrifice my blood."

That hit me right there. Magic? Just as I thought. "Perhaps, you move stuff out of the ordinary?"

"Kyle! You're talking about the Loitering sign and the mailboxes, aren't you?"

"Yes." I hoped for a safe answer.

"Sometimes, when I’m emotional, it just happens."

Okay...this is interestingly creepy. First, the magic, then the emotional stuff. And how did she manage to move within walking distance of my house. Single houses all the same and then we have the same class. All was such a coincidence. I'm playing a game.

"I'm still here. If you are tired, I’ll watch you sleep. " I said boldly.

"Eek, how boring is that? Why don't we sleep together?"

And then there are chances where she moves even faster than me.

"If that's what you want."

And it was what she wanted.

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"I brought my toothbrush."

"Great."

"Hmm..i smell good food. Pancakes?"

"Crab cakes."

"You're family's awesome."

"My magical family's awesome. Mom's a wizard. Dad's normal but he carries a certain magical gene, called Liason Feelings."

"What's that?"

"Just...feelings activated magic. I have the gene though. It's kind of wild. Glad you enjoyed it?"

"LOOOL." I shook my head. "Wait, so are you like bipolar?"

"Eek, stop using such terms to define me."

"Sorry." I muttered. "We're here." The tall building of school loomed ahead of us.

" Umm, i sacrifice my blood for..It’s like Liason Feelings is free and all other magic is paid."

"Ahh... i see. So you are lucky to be a half wizard."

"I feel like I’m doing nothing."

"Your tears..."

"I was upset that day."

"No doubt." I replied. "You can cry that long."

"Yeah..." And she looked away.

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The Northern wind blows into Delaware and wraps it in it's proud suit of freeze. A cold gripped state and bound to snow, but it doesn't. It doesn't give the joy my mother wanted to see, it doesn't play the part, just looks like it..

 

The cold grips the bark of the testifying trees, once green and rosemary, to vine, spiny, and vicious. What had become of a dry autumn has morphed into a still and mystic winter, without any early hope for the incoming spring, ever. Through the smoke out of our chimneys, out went the forbidden past, and in was the warmth of the fireplace, which was the remembrance of a still better tomorrow.  It seems like our entire family hood is forever intact and ongoing. My mother started coming home at 5:00pm and that was to be with me before i fly to college. She says she missed me sometimes and can't help but to come and see me.

My dad's job is ever so demanding, a research scientist and still persevering. He comes home at 7:00pm now.

For Judith and I, we meet every Saturday morning to spend time together as a couple. She's busy on the other days, especially Sunday because she has violin practice. I know she's very good in her studies, with her 4.0 GPA and all. Looking at her, i am very proud. She is the independent adult i would want a girlfriend to be.

When i had first introduced her to the family, my mom was overly ecstatic and my dad accepting. He nodded at me while my mother mouthed finally. Then she patted my head, which i take it as the appreciative motherly touch. This was the first friend i had introduced into our house. They've been waiting too long for this. Me finally having a girlfriend was something to celebrate. I was happy as well at their responses. When Judith left the house that same time, my dad remarked how she was such a fine lady.

I pretty much beamed.

 Anticipating the Saturday as usual, i decided to read the daily newspaper. So and so committed suicide however survived and found a purpose to live only after he saw his son for the first time. His son was adopted into someone else's family because of financial reasons and now mother and son are united. Such a touching story....let's leave it at that.

Before the doorbell would ring, i want to say i am especially excited for today. I want to make out with her and snuggle with her and cook the best food for her health. Since the passing days it seems as if  she were, although the same bubbling persona, thinking about another important thing that is clogging her mind.

Dingding.

She's here! "Hey!"

I open the door for her and smile. I wonder if she has sacrificed lately or practiced her magic. She has told me that in the magic realm, with enough magical power dust floating around, there is no need for the magic to feed on blood. So why didn't she live there? i would say. She would reply that it was to find me. I said what? Am i anything special? She bit her lip and laughed, saying, I'll tell you later.

Perhaps, today's the day.

She burrows herself into my chest and her hair tickles my neck. "I've missed you." She says.

"Me too. Since yesterday." We laugh.

She wears a pink and grey stripped sweater with washed jeans and heeled boots.

"I want to tell you something." She begins.

"The thing?" Wait, am i supposed to look so interested in myself...

"Yes, Kyle! You're so innocent." She breathes, still entangled in me.

"Let's go to my bedroom.. Hopefully it's clean." I joked.

"Yes, let's go." We climb the stair and sit cross legged on the bed.

"What have you been doing these days? You have a nicely decorated house." She pronounced. "Oh wait, are you going to design the next flash professional or the next Photoshop?"

"Me, no... I’m not that goo-I’m not into that-I’ve already redesigned every program i use, not to sound haughty."

"You're not, and come on, touch me." she says.

I grab her hand and kiss it in a princely way, knowing she'd receive it.

"Anyways, Kyle, i only have a few minutes today...before i take you to my house.”

"So what did you want to tell me?"

A moment of silence passes.

"I can awaken your wizardly powers." She said, her tone indicating that she would wait for the surprise reaction in mine.

I was surprised but taken back. "I don't have wizardly powers."

"Yes, you do." She insisted, squeezed my hand and smiled. “I’ll show you when you come to my house."

"Okay." Her happiness was like quick fire. It spread into me and set me ablaze too.

As we crossed the 20 or so minutes to her house, i felt a desire to acknowledge just exactly what she had said. I'm a wizard. If anything, my entire life has been nothing but magical. Still hope glimmers at the surface. Hope that i'll be just like her.

She opens the hazelnut colored door easily and we were inside her house. It was a little smaller than mine but precisely how she liked it. 3800 square feet of pure heaven. There was a still atmosphere in the air as if anything can happen and the tables and chairs were all oak wood, sturdy and compact. What's more, their color design was magnificent. Just the reds, oranges, and purples and whites.

A startling chandelier hovers over the open space that just serves as a transition from the stairs and the living room. I've noticed that she plays four instruments: piano, violin, guitar and drums. She said that this combo is her favorite band set, or at least somewhat close.

As we pass her parents who openly acknowledge us, her smiling dad of 48 years and mother of 45. They were both welcoming and sympathetic. Mr. and Mrs. Kulles they were called.

As we settled into the nice warm bedroom of my love, I couldn't help but anticipate her soft voice, no drone of a boring talker or too excited chatter of a gossip girl, however popular, but the ever silvery sound that brought me to sigh and for my heart to flutter in quick intervals.

I still remember the hints she dropped regarding something she secretly knew about me. Could it be, am I a...

"Wizard, you're a wizard. I hope this wait isn't like 20 days to die...? I mean that's like...not proficient way of waiting....I know you're surprised, like i promised. I can tell you were feeling quite lighthearted today so it's okay for me to tell you because i know it's the right time to. Has to be. It's how i found you. You were in pieces before, but i am here and i hope you won't be sad again. Kyle!"

I don't know what to say. I barely expected this. I thought she'd say something like going to the Bahamas or somewhere with me. I trust her with all my heart so...

"Please, awaken them."

She smiles effortlessly. "So i will." Under her breath she muttered. "Time is running out."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Nothing."