[Wal-mart Oughtta Have One Less Wii Card]

Thanks for your review. It's about being forced to stay in a small town that thinks there's something wrong with you

In our town, there *is* a list of rules
Which say that only on Tuesdays
Must the man with one arm walk
For the illusion is that on Mondays
He will watch porn and sodomize his three-legged dog
And Wednesdays will hide from the town-folk

Another rule is that cars traveling 
North are on the road to freedom
And south on the route 666
For the illusion is that in Texas
The devil hides in basketball and football jerseys 
And the lake is where people oughtta go

The list is long, a square-shot
For living good
And no loud music on the Broadway 
And Main junction or you could
Go to hell for sure. The list includes the rule
that says riches come
For those who watch the lifting arms of our industry
Without respect to the cut-down trees they bore

The square-shot intersections
And the robotic arms without their pair
Are all really found together in this list of rules 
To keep us out of Wal-Mart and in
The pawn shops instead
Buying, selling, and pawning
For the neighborhood’s real men
Like to barter

So even though I had not read the list
I was breaking a rule in Electronics
Shopping for a new game card
The kind you load cash with
And when I left the store
I thought of another rule
That I ought-to move away so 
This town will have one less
Re-tard
But my home is here so instead
Wal-Mart oughtta have one less Wii card

Author's Note

I'm going to read this aloud