Rhyming Quatrains with a Rhyming Couplet envoi poem regarding thoughts of death...
Grateful to Richard for finding the perfect artwork for my poem and helping me along my journey writing poetry.
Whoever said sadness and death have no beauty, never read this.
It was great working together with you in formulating this creatively gorgeous piece.
Many memorable blessings shared … thank you always, Ma'am! ⁓ Richard🖌
Posted 11 Months Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
11 Months Ago
Hi Richard,
Great to get a review from you. This is one of my most favorite poems I have writ.. read moreHi Richard,
Great to get a review from you. This is one of my most favorite poems I have written.
Of course I have been thinking of you….and even more in the past couple of days.
My plan was to message you… and, and I will…
~ Lisa
A bloody marvelous old style traditional lyric. From the opening line image of lying in lavender ablaze in the sun I was absolutely enchanted. First thought was of Yeats, but as you progress on it reminded me more of Lawrence.
Oh my goodness what an astounding review... Comparing me to the greats...
I am new to posting.. read moreOh my goodness what an astounding review... Comparing me to the greats...
I am new to posting having kept my poems in a drawer for years. I have no education in writing poems or Sonnets.I had never read any poetry until recently....and, had no idea what a Sonnet was until dear Richard contacted me when I posted my first piece, 7 months ago, Hand~In~Hand ,and told me that it was actually a Sonnet, except for the ending lines... He asked if I might like his help finishing it. I of course said yes and I have been under his wing ever since. I have learned a lot..and I love it.
I wonder how you discovered me? And, hope you will find time to read more of mine.
Thank you again!!
Lisa
2 Years Ago
All the more impressive for the short while you have been at it. As to how I found you and your poe.. read moreAll the more impressive for the short while you have been at it. As to how I found you and your poem, I'm new here, just joined and having posted my first poem I lingered a spell to check out the works of some other writers
2 Years Ago
That is so wonderful to hear Ken...
I am new to posting and that took some getting used to.... read moreThat is so wonderful to hear Ken...
I am new to posting and that took some getting used to... But I have been writing since I was 10 years old...a very long time..
Great poem and art work , I like Kissing a salty neck , tho I’ve never had the pleasure , that’s life
I like remember my laughter in the ocean waves , nice line
Well done Lisa
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi Stuart,
I am going back over all my poems to make sure I thanked everyone for reviewing my.. read moreHi Stuart,
I am going back over all my poems to make sure I thanked everyone for reviewing my poems... I was sure I responded to your wonderful review. I clearly remember reading it... so strange. Anyway, thank you so much.
Lisa, still in Spain
Hi Lisa,
I was excited at the prospect of reading your poem "Forevermore". I wasn't disappointed. Your writing is at once beautiful and technically amazing--filtered through the sands of experience. You write as though your abilities are at their reaching their peak. Like a forest at its climax.
Perry
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Wow Perry, What an amazing review of my poem Forevermore. I wrote this early one morning when thinki.. read moreWow Perry, What an amazing review of my poem Forevermore. I wrote this early one morning when thinking of my own death and the words just flowed out of me.
To be excited about reading my poem inspires me to continue writing.
Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to review my poem. Your review is like a poem itself!!
Lisa, now visiting Galicia, Spain
‘Remember my laughter in ocean’s waves,’ such a chillingly beautiful visual here. In the whole poem, there’s absolutely beautiful visuals that capture that deep loyalty and love. This poem is so passionate and strong, reminding us how love lives on and can still grow and grow after it leaves. This poem has a warm and comforting energy to it, like a hug. It flows smoothly and is absolutely heartwarming. Thank you so much for sharing this lovely piece.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Hi Cat, so glad you read and reviewed my poem...means a lot to me...
This poem is about my ow.. read moreHi Cat, so glad you read and reviewed my poem...means a lot to me...
This poem is about my own death...thoughts about it and the life I now share with the love of my life...
(40 years)
I am happy to know you liked it,
Lisa, in Galicia, Spain
Thank you for taking the time to read and review my poem. This poem is about thoughts of my death.read moreThank you for taking the time to read and review my poem. This poem is about thoughts of my death.
Lisa, traveling by train in Spain
Very lovely poem. It is a rapture of delicate delights and soft comfort; beauty surrounds. Thank you for this escapade. Then it transitions into everlasting love and intimacy. Thank you
Hi Brad,
Good to see you reviewing... This poem is actually about my death.... I woke up one .. read moreHi Brad,
Good to see you reviewing... This poem is actually about my death.... I woke up one morning and just wrote down my thoughts..
Glad to know you liked it.
I appreciate your thoughts,
Lisa, now in Spain
2 Years Ago
Wow. Another deep layer to it. Thank you
2 Years Ago
Oh I am so glad I let you know… Now if you read it again it will must likely feel different….read moreOh I am so glad I let you know… Now if you read it again it will must likely feel different….
Lisa, still feeling like I am 40!!
Thank you for your very kind review Crosby!
Lisa, now in Spain
2 Years Ago
Nice, hope you’re enjoying the Spanish weather 😊
2 Years Ago
This is the hottest summer so far...Only been here two years...
But certainly enjoying Spain... read moreThis is the hottest summer so far...Only been here two years...
But certainly enjoying Spain..
Lisa
This poem is primarily lineated with 4-stress lines. A couple of spots may be one word two many but overall a lovely accomplishment.
W.
Posted 2 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
2 Years Ago
Please send me where there may be a word too many.
This way I can see what you mean.
L.. read morePlease send me where there may be a word too many.
This way I can see what you mean.
Lisa
I now understand what you were thinking.. However, as I said this is a 10 syllable per line poem... .. read moreI now understand what you were thinking.. However, as I said this is a 10 syllable per line poem... no two ways about it... so I can not just take out a word here and there..
That just would not work.
lisa
2 Years Ago
You are right. A syllabic constraint means a syllabic constraint.
You have a way with words. I can't tell if you put a lot of thought into this or if it came easily to you. It's very well written. Doesn't rhyme but it's flows smoothly. The way ou got the imagery across speaks volumes to your talent. I enjoyed it. Thank you for the read. It was beautiful.
Also thank you for taking the time to review my work and pointing out the grammar error, lol. A lot of the poems I have probably have errors that I never went back to correct. I write so quickly with excitement I just never bother.
Hi Flo,
Thank you for reading my poem... Actually is rhymes..Did you read my authors note at .. read moreHi Flo,
Thank you for reading my poem... Actually is rhymes..Did you read my authors note at the top... Rhyming quatrains, and a rhyming couplet.
So Lavender and surrender
then, sun and done
Then, waves and caves
and, world and swirled....
and so on every other line rhymes..
Not sure why you think it doesn't rhyme?
Lisa, now in Spain
2 Years Ago
No, I missed the note above. Ahh, i see what you did. Thanks for explaining. I retract my statement,.. read moreNo, I missed the note above. Ahh, i see what you did. Thanks for explaining. I retract my statement, lol.
2 Years Ago
You are so funny Flo... No need to retract... I just was wondering why you felt my poem did not rhym.. read moreYou are so funny Flo... No need to retract... I just was wondering why you felt my poem did not rhyme...
Always open to knowing why,
Lisa, now in Spain
Well, first off, anyone that uses the word "envoi" in her description of the poem definitely belongs in the cafe so welcome! Now as for the poem itself, I have a long history of not particularly liking the use of colors or pictures or anything to enhance the poem itself, but today...well today is not a usual day for me and I can most definitely use some "lavender" and "ocean's wave's" so you caught me at the most perfect of perfect times. Love beyond the hand that strays this realm. Love beyond anything that worries of anything for trust or separation or our human fragilities and can last like wine so perfectly entwined at its stem with another to produce and combine. Yes! Today is most definitely a good day for love and lavender so thank you for sharing. Now in America!
What a perfect review for my little poem... I appreciate it that you took the time to read it and re.. read moreWhat a perfect review for my little poem... I appreciate it that you took the time to read it and review it.
Color is such a huge thing in my life as I am a professional watercolorist... so adding color to my poems says a lot about me.
Hoever CRY another of my poems has no clot...but it does have an image...and, images are also so important to me...
I was from California... but moved to beautiful Spain 2 years go...I am meant to be here... Lisa
2 Years Ago
You have both my entry state and some of my ancestry country going so as far as I'm concerned Hello .. read moreYou have both my entry state and some of my ancestry country going so as far as I'm concerned Hello fellow traveler..hahaha!! You're most welcome and your art is simply that, "your art" so let the colors and images fly...if it makes you as well as others smile as it did me today then even better!! That is what art is all about, cheers~
2 Years Ago
For sure and so much fun that we connected across the world..
Lisa, originally from Hollywood.. read moreFor sure and so much fun that we connected across the world..
Lisa, originally from Hollywood, Ca.
I have been writing poetry and short stories since I was 10..so 64 years!
I have never connected with any groups but recently thought why not..
So here I ..looking at where this adventure leads me. more..