Canvas of Dreams

Posted my poem a month ago, then decided that it needed work. Only just now reposted it. The trouble I was having was with the tenses, but with the kind help of Richard I was able to figure it out.

~ Canvas of Dreams ~

Staring at the ceiling ...

moments since he left,

faded light appearing

slowly, through satin curtains.

Muted colours changed,

grey to white …

the ceiling, my canvas

of dreams, is still there.

His smell, lingering in the air;

I stroke his pillow,

unaware he has returned

for another taste of the moment,

and to kiss me goodbye.

-·~*~·-

Reviews

[willweb]

I really like this, it just feels wonderful to read and imagine. She lingers in thoughts of him not realizing he is still there as he surprises her to show her how much he truly loves her. That was wonderful. It does feel as if it is part of mine, the perfect ending it seems. What I enjoy the most besides your use of words to create images is that those images are left up to the reader to design.
Ok, so I have one other, if you'd like to read it. It is a sonnet titled Summer's Sultry Heat.

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much!!
Lisa

[Blunt--Instrument]

Beautiful sensual writing. As told by a lover and artist alike. There’s a gentle float to your words.
As an artist I’m always saying that using white is the hardest and best accent color. I thought of that seeing you write “grey to white”

Like

[Lisasview]

Well, hello again... I was just saying you are welcome to the poem of yours that I reviewed and now I see you reviewed one of mine... Interesting that you picked up on grey to white, but then again that is because you are an artist. With watercolour I never use white..only the white that is the paper...
Thank you for your comments...
Lisa, writing and reviewing...in Spain

[Blunt--Instrument]

I use watercolor and gouache together a lot. Hence the white overlay sometimes. I love grey too and of course black. I’m totally self taught as a painter. Been at it for decades. Watercolor scares me still but I love the fright… I’m all abstract

[Lisasview]

I too am self taught as a painter and have been teaching water color for years.
I do like abstract art..
Lisa. about to have a cappuccino

[Perry]

The quietude is startling. Limpid. You've gathered together all that could be said. then illustrated for us in a single, bold stroke of emotion.

[Lisasview]

Oh Gosh Perry,
How did I forget to thank you for your very kind and astute review of my poem???
I decided to go back over all the poems I posted to make sure I have seen and responded to each review...and I found this one of yours..
So again...thank you.
Lisa, working hard...

[Perry]

Ha! I struggle keeping track of responses. I know one thing for sure. Your writing is powerful, intimate and lingering.
Perry

[lilfriend]

Hi Lisa,
Aftermath of a loved one leaving and everything in the room becomes part of our dream, as his image become imprinted and his memories become engraved in every object. What a lovely little poem, it gives a reason to love what we have as it was shared by someone whom we have loved in abundance.
Thanks for sharing this gem with us.

[Lisasview]

Wow, what an insightful review...Thank you for taking the time to read and review. These types of review inspire me to continue writing!
Lisa, in Galicia, Spain

[Stuart Munro]

Lisa , A very nice poem with strong visualisation and love smells
Love the art work , and word presentation ,

[Lisasview]

So glad you love my little poem... I too love the art work and enjoyed writing this poem.
Lisa, responding to reviews

[Weeping willow]

Such a beautifully expressed poem, with words only in a dream can make. ;-}

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
So sorry it has taken me a while to say tank you..but actually I just saw your sweet review a few minutes ago for the first time.
I do appreciate that you take the time to read and review!
Lisa, now in Spain

[Weeping willow]

Welcome ;-] a lovely write. I bet Spain is a beautiful place.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

This is such a sweet, loving piece with a tinge of melancholy and bitterness. But it ends with a little bit extra of that sweetness, definitely leaving a smile on the reader’s face. The image you chose here perfectly evokes what you wrote, staring up sleepily at your ceiling with longing burning up your chest. ‘The ceiling, my canvas of dreams is still there.’ Absolutely beautiful line. Thank you so much for sharing such a wonderful piece.

[Lisasview]

Hi again, for some reason my responses to your reviews do not get to you??? I often look back and see that my response is not there...so i rewrite a new thank you.
At first I thought the issue was with me...I thought perhaps I was not pressing post comment... but this has happened way too many times so there must be a glitch every so often with the site.
I always love you intuitive reviews and so appreciate you.
Lisa, checking my review...just to be sure

[redzone]

I think often, the 'canvas of dreams' we paint on demands they remain with us even after departing.... not sure I would/could leave again after returning for a kiss.... love pulls and entices, it haunts us during the day and at night.... what lovely colors we use to create that canvas.... soft and tender poem, Lisa.... thanks for sharing....

[Lisasview]

Thank you for stopping by to review!
I do so appreciate it.
I am going to post to new poems
Luscious
And, Go Go Dancer
You might like these..
Lisa,
Late after afternoon in Spain

[Patricia]

Oh I love this, I’ve had this moment before and never bothered to put it on paper…. Now I don’t need to, I can just recite yours ;) you did the moment justice! Well done ;)

[Lisasview]

Oh dear Pat how wonderful to know that you loved this!! I awoke one morning and was staring at the ceiling and this poem appeared out of no where!
Thank you for your wonderful review,
Lisa, taking a break from watching TV

[Patricia]

I read it to my hubby and he said, “Awwww” ;D
Those are precious moments and deserved to be penned, so glad you did! Write on!

[Lisasview]

I often read poetry from this site to my husband...
Wow, you really must have liked my poem...
Thank you,
Lisa, up late today..7:45

[Cherrie Palmer]

You are a true artist. Your art is in everything you do.

[Lisasview]

Wow dear Cherrie, What a very delightful thing for you to say!!
I am so happy to know you liked my poem and the way I presented it.
Lisa, hot day in Spain