Cry

Thanking Richard with his fabulous help. Rhyming Quatrains and Couplet in 10-count

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

The hurt here is palpable and leaves the reader wondering what the cause of the sustained anguish might be; the death of a spouse perhaps? We do ascertain that the relationship was sustained for " so many years" so naturally we deduce that the depth of feeling was mutual. But we are left with the sense that the object of pain and desire might be "back around" leading us to think of a broken relationship or a ghost perhaps. This was an intriguing write. Thank you for sharing.

[Lisasview]

Hi Fabian,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my little poem... To be honest I have no idea where this poem came from... I got up one morning and felt a pressure to write it... Perhaps it is about my past loves and losses?? All within me...Sadly, I relate to my poem although now and for the past 40 years I have been in a relationship with no goodbyes... But before then I had so many almost long term loves..
Thank you for saying that this was an intriguing write... really means a lot to me. And, inspires me!
Lisa, finally on the computer after a long, long day day

[Raven A. Myn]

Oh this one is so gut wrenchingly beautiful! Each stanza hits hard. "pulse-beats quicken at mere thoughts of a sound." This is my favorite line. And I love the final couplet it just binds it all together. Amazing job, Lisa!

[Lisasview]

Oh gosh thank you for reading and reviewing. I was quite young when I went through this... Pretty painful... but time has a great way of healing...
Lisa

[Raven A. Myn]

It's funny how I'm now around the same age you were when you wrote this, and I find this poem so relatable to me.

[Lisasview]

Ahhh, to be young and have to advantage of a computer, etc. All my work is either in pencil or pen on scraps of odd paper. I began writing when I was 10 years old, when I wrote a 3 page story... Never had any schooling in writing stories or poems...
Basically learned from doing...
Lisa

[Michael]

I feel sad just reading this, the description of loss and the impact on the subject are palpable.

I just noticed two reviews both used the word palpable!

[Lisasview]

Hi Michael,
As I am going back over my reviews for all my work... a big job... I noticed that I neglected to thank you for taking the time to read and reviewing my work!
Lisa, now in Spain

[Michael]

No thanks required the gift is given unconditionally.

[Blunt--Instrument]

This is truly where the painting draws in the reader in and commands that he read through to the end. Exquisite painting, lonesome words and longing....

BIG LIKE

[Lisasview]

This is so crazy Blunt~
How could all the thank you messages I sent to you not be showing up... So weird..
Anyway I am delighted once again that you liked my words..
Lisa

[Nima.Hope]

Hi Lisa, hope everything is fine with you. When I saw the picture of this writing, a painting if Van Gogh came to my mind about a pregnant and depressed woman. Break-ups are always sad, because most of the times the friendship is gone too. This poem impressed me emotionally.
Nicely penned.
Nima, somewhere in Persia

[Lisasview]

Hi Nima,
I am moved that you were affected by my poem. I feel so lucky to have found the perfect image to represent the true feeling I had when I wrote this. You are so right Nima.. when there is a break-up the friendship is usually gone.
Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to review.
Lisa, now in Tarragona, Spain..everything is fine..thank you for asking.

[Nima.Hope]

My pleasure dear Lisa, wish you the best.

[Writergurl]

Such an emotional, heart tugging read. You express yourself very well

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem. I appreciate it very much!read moreHi there,
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem. I appreciate it very much!
Lisa, one train in 🇪🇸 Spain

[Crowley]

So mournful and full of the lament of loss. It is so fluid and even in tone. You did a splendid job on this one. You need to be proud of it for sure. Getting help from Richard is always a great idea, he has helped most of us out a time or two. Great work!

[Lisasview]

Thank you Crowley for your excellent review.
Reviews are so important and I appreciate that you took the time to read and review mine.
You might like the one I wrote.... Innocence.
Lisa, early morning in Spain

[Patricia Wedel]

Lonesome Blues are Cries in the Night…. among the Whippoorwills and the Chills of Ice on Moonlit Hills… bring memories of a Hot Tea Kettle whistling on the 💜 Hearth… Autumn 🍂 leaves and Wild Geese flying in formation … as He disappeared in flurries of Snow. I will grow fonder of the Candles lit with Prayers rendered like Bread Crumbs on a Path to be remembered. gently, Pat

[Lisasview]

Hi Pat, Thank you once again for finding one of my poems and leaving such an amazing review. Your reviews are like poems themselves... I know I have said this to you before...
Really do appreciate you,
Lisa, now in Spain

[Patricia Wedel]

dearest Lisa… the Autumn is inspiring and I am thinking of Apple Pie and wedges of sharp Cheese as we feel the Breeze through the trees… be blessed. gently, Pat

[Lisasview]

Oh my that does sound so delicious.
I am working hard on my new Sonnet..really quite a challenge.
Hope all is well with you and your family,
Lisa

[Patricia Wedel]

I will be looking for your Sonnet… it almost seems like you are a Composer of 🎶 Music with 🎻 Violins… tenderly, Pat

[Lisasview]

Well, dear Pa.. I began piano for the very first time when I was 50 years old... and, I still practise nearly ever day and take weeks lessons... I hope to get my Sonnet posted very soon.
Thank you,
Lisa

[Bryan Sefton]

It is all so descriptive. The dreaming, the longing, the sad walk to the window, the sad recollecting. If you haven't lived it you certainly will in reading this lovely, but so sad, poem.

[Lisasview]

Wow Bryan, I am so delighted to know you were moved by my poem. I woke up one morning and felt a very strong need to write this done..I do wonder where my thoughts come from... They just seem to appear.
I so appreciate your great review.
Lisa, now in Spain

[_rabbitofhabit (1word)]

Good imagery. I like how you set the scene in this way. You paint a striking image using minimalistic wording.

I also liked the word play of: “for, never…”

I’ve learned a new words: traipse. I like its use here.

I especially like the fourth stanza. The word choice really shines here (morn’s…pulse-beats quicken at mere thoughts of sound…recalling hurt…).

I like the format.

The image used here is also very nice and appropriate.

[Lisasview]

This is one of those poems that just poured out of me and, only needed a little tweaking..
Thank you again for reviewing my words...
Lisa, need to spend some time writing...

[Lisasview]

Hi there,
Rereading your lovely review.. I am wondering what you meant when you said "I also liked the word play of: “for, never…”
Thank you,
Lisa

[_rabbitofhabit (1word)]

I thought it somewhat alluded to 'forever'. Except, though sounding a bit similar if read quickly, it meant the exact opposite.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Crying is such a therapeutic thing, but sometimes when you just can’t stop crying it can feel like you’re drowning. I feel that despair here in these words and just the heartache and needing to curl in bed. The emotions and pain are so palpable, and the words add to the beauty of it. It’s such a visually striking poem, it reminds me of a storm and maybe that works because of the storm of emotions you were able to produce. It’s beautifully written and thank you so much for sharing such an inspiring piece.

[Lisasview]

Wow, what an amazing and insightful review Cat.
I woke up one morning and just rote it all out.
Not a comfortable feeling t write about...and even now as I read again it is so very painful.
I felt this way once upon a time... Luckily that is all behind me now.
I so appreciate that you always leave me such great reviews,
Lisa, in hot Spain