Hand-In-Hand

My very first Sonnet ever. This Sonnet is about the forever remembered love for a mother or grandmother. remembered.

Hand-In-Hand....

Her tired eyes saw more than I'll ever know;

long silv'ry hair piled high upon her head,

the clean fresh scent of times so long ago ...

warm stinging tears are those I often shed.

Remembering her laughter through our years,

when we walked hand in hand along the shore.

As lovely sounds of church bells filled my ears,

my love still held by ocean's distant roar.

Now, fresh white, fragrant lilies near her lie,

a few soft petals fallen from the rain ...

their faces wet, turned up toward the sky;

along with them she takes rest from her pain. 

Sweet memories we shared now mean so much,

each day, I long for her caressing touch.

                                   ~~~

                                     

Author's Note

A very special thank you to Richard!! Who saw this as a Sonnet (I had no idea what a Sonnet even was!!) and, helped me complete it. He opened up a whole new world to me.
Thank you,
Lisa

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This was particularly touching to me. I was the primary caregiver for my mother the last five years of her life. It was the hardest and most challenging task I have ever undertaken. Given the chance, I'd gladly do it all again. By her grave, I was almost too exhausted to cry. But I found great comfort in knowing her worldly suffering had come an end even though I know I will miss her until we meet again. Thank you for this, I enjoyed. F.

[Lisasview]

Thank you Fabian,
I am glad you liked it.
My plan is to rework my Sonnet so please look for it again.
I too took care of my mother for several years.
And, of my father in law and also my step mother.
Loads of work but I would never trade it. For the precious time I spent with them will be in my memory forever.

[Lisasview]

Hi Fabian, Just submitted my newest version of this poem and I also submitted one that I am working on.
Hoping you have time to look at them.
Lisa

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Beautiful truly beautiful
Loved it
I miss my mum xx
Thanks

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much for your review Julie.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I think this made me think of my mother and how much I miss her.
I love the idea of the petals with faces turned up toward the sky....
quite a touching image.
j.

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much Jacob for reviewing my poem. I appreciate the feedback..
This and Mothers Letter are my favorites..

[Lisasview]

Hi Jacob,
Well, I just submitted my latest version of Hand in Hand.. Worked on it for quite sometime..My first Sonnet ever!! I also submitted my latest Sonnet..still working on it..Hoping you have time to read them..

[Richard🖌]

Hm?

Ah, Lisa 🥀
I think with proper iambic pentameter through every line, this lovely, heart-dancing poem could be made into a most wonderful English Sonnet … already, eight lines are in perfect meter; the rest would be easy to sort out, if you're the mind to. Let me know if I can help.

I also think you've the eloquent mind, heart, and soul of a true master poetess.
It can be so very-very painful letting go; yet, in the spirit as you say it, memories can be the warmest smiles of all.

Welcome, to the Café, Dear Poetess🥂
Hugs to you, Merry Christmas, and the Happiest of Holiday Cheer!
Come see me sometime ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Lisasview]

Good morning Richard and Merry Christmas..
Finally figured out how to respond the the reviews so I spent the better part of the last 2 hours doing so..
Would love to know how to add photos to my poems??
Also, I did get your last email and I will be responding to that today..
Lisa

[Richard🖌]

Merry Christmas to you, too, Lisa ☃️

Glad you were able to figure out how to reply to reviews. I'll send you easy instructions by message for adding pictures.⁓🍃
Looking forward to your response to my message.
Do you have any particular comment or feedback on my review?

Bless your day! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Richard🖌]

Well, Lisa 🍂

You've worked hard and diligently, and you now have a lovely, proper Shakespearean Sonnet in reward for your earnest efforts.
Hand-In-Hand is beautiful and spot-on in every detail and aspect a Sonnet should be.
Congratulations on your first Sonnet, and a most humble thank you for mentioning my name.
I've enjoyed the honor and privilege of working with you … You made it an enjoyable venture.

With my warmest hug! ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Lisasview]

Oh Richard it is so nice to hear from you.. I really missed you all of yesterday!!
Thank you for your kind comments.. Gosh, my very first sonnet!! WOW

[Richard🖌]

Lisa 💫

The changes you've made have woken this already wonderfully laid Sonnet so very nicely, gifting it a true maturity and beauty that swells the heart full with appreciation for all you've accomplished in so short a time.

How blissful to witness a flower opening to its glorious fulness.
Thank you most humbly, Lisa, for letting me join you in the effort. ⁓ Richard 🍃

[Lisasview]

Dearest Richard,
Thank you so much for your kind words.
With your help I have learned so much in the past few weeks..Thank you again for seeing that this poem of mine was actually a Sonnet in the making (I never knew!!) and opening my eyes and heart to a whole new world.
Lisa

[Richard🖌]

Lisa,

You are more than welcome.
All it takes is a keen eye to spot potential promise, a wee bit of learning, and an adequate amount of dedicated practice.
You've done an exemplary job in all aspects, making working with you a genuine pleasure.

It is I who thanks You for the privilege! ⁓ Richard🖌