Hand-In-Hand

My very first Sonnet ever. This Sonnet is about the forever remembered love for a mother or grandmother. remembered.

Hand-In-Hand....

Her tired eyes saw more than I'll ever know;

long silv'ry hair piled high upon her head,

the clean fresh scent of times so long ago ...

warm stinging tears are those I often shed.

Remembering her laughter through our years,

when we walked hand in hand along the shore.

As lovely sounds of church bells filled my ears,

my love still held by ocean's distant roar.

Now, fresh white, fragrant lilies near her lie,

a few soft petals fallen from the rain ...

their faces wet, turned up toward the sky;

along with them she takes rest from her pain. 

Sweet memories we shared now mean so much,

each day, I long for her caressing touch.

                                   ~~~

                                     

Author's Note

A very special thank you to Richard!! Who saw this as a Sonnet (I had no idea what a Sonnet even was!!) and, helped me complete it. He opened up a whole new world to me.
Thank you,
Lisa

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This was particularly touching to me. I was the primary caregiver for my mother the last five years of her life. It was the hardest and most challenging task I have ever undertaken. Given the chance, I'd gladly do it all again. By her grave, I was almost too exhausted to cry. But I found great comfort in knowing her worldly suffering had come an end even though I know I will miss her until we meet again. Thank you for this, I enjoyed. F.

[Lisasview]

Thank you Fabian,
I am glad you liked it.
My plan is to rework my Sonnet so please look for it again.
I too took care of my mother for several years.
And, of my father in law and also my step mother.
Loads of work but I would never trade it. For the precious time I spent with them will be in my memory forever.

[Lisasview]

Hi Fabian, Just submitted my newest version of this poem and I also submitted one that I am working on.
Hoping you have time to look at them.
Lisa

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much for reading my first sonnet and for the review.
I appreciate it.

[Lisasview]

I wrote this when I was thinking of my own death.
Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Lisa

[Rew]

Yes. A sonnet it is.
Furthermore, with it, you are now connected back to Elizabethan times and Shakespeare and obliquely even further back to Petrarch.
Where to next?
Another fixed verse form?
Triolets, perhaps?
Or a Rondeau. The " Christmas Eve " of mine you read (thank you) is a rondeau.
" a whole new world " opened, you say, with your Sonnet.
Get into other fixed forms and the universe, itself, will open up.

Regards from Rew.

[Lisasview]

Hi Rew,
Thank you so much for your great comment.. I just submitted another Sonnet..and several other poems..Such fun..
Lisa

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Just read it again it’s beautiful
Xx

[Lisasview]

Finally catching up with thanking everyone for their review.. I was a bit out of it with COVID...I am fine now.. so thank you Julie!!

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Beautiful
Love the whole shabang
Hope you well

[Lisasview]

Hi Julie,
I just submitted my new version.. worked on this Sonnet for quite along time.
I also put a new one on, Pearls..working on it.. Love what you said..Love the whole shebang..I seldom hear that word..Lisa

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Yes me too re shabang !
It’s like in old days they used shananagans meaning naughty behaviour or you to no good mum used it and grandfather father too
Ok I’ll read again and new one too
Thanks xx

[Lisasview]

So funny and you are right..Shabang.. never used much any more but delightful to hear!! I mean read..

[Chris Shaw]

Hello Lisa. Your posted image is perfect for the words of your sonnet. Although I can't remember each line of your first attempt, I can certainly remember how I felt reading it. Poems in my opinion are never completely finished. I tinker with mine for years. I can understand very much why you want this one to be kept 'alive'. The memory of your beloved mother, is obviously one you cherish. Beautiful thoughts and sentiment woven into your words.

Chris

[Lisasview]

It looks like I never thanked you for your kind review..
I really appreciate that you read my new version.. Now it is a real Sonnet..
Lisa

[Chris Shaw]

It is. I visited again as my own mother died this week Lisa, from the same awful disease.

[Lisasview]

Oh no, I really feel for you. Even when people said "Oh your mother is in a better place" or "feel, now your mother has no pain" these words did not comfort me.
Time is the only real thing that helped me get through it.. I do think of her so often..
Lisa

[andrew mitchell]

A poem of memories while going through grief and loss. Nicely composed Lisa.

[Lisasview]

Oh gosh I am so sorry not to have commented on your review.. I had COVID a month ago and fell far behind in sending thank yous..
Actually I believe you read my Hand-in Hand before I did the revisions in my writing and added color. If you happen to have the time I would love it if you would read it now as it is complete.
Thank you for your review Andrew,
Lisa

[Chris Shaw]

I miss my mum. She hasn't died, but she has dementia. Sadly the wonderful vibrant soul she was is no more. I grieve for the loss of her and yet she is still with us, albeit almost a stranger. Your lines remind me of all the wonderful times we shared before this cruel disease took her from us. I remember my mum's laughter, her sense of fun and her unconditional love for our family. Thank you fir sharing your work.

Chris

[Lisasview]

Good morning Chris,
Your review made me cry. I lost my mother to dementia and it was heartbreaking to see her go that way. It seemed that one minute she was here making a cup of tea in a bone china cup (the only way she would drink her tea) and the next she could care less if it were in a paper cup..I miss her terribly.

[Chris Shaw]

Such a cruel disease Lisa. So sorry for your loss.

[Lisasview]

Thank you..
Just spend as much time as you can with your mother..that helps at the end.

[Gee]

My mum hated us buying her lillies, "save them for when I'm dead" she used to say.
Another enjoyable piece Lisa

[Lisasview]

My mother hated getting any cut flowers...she only wanted the ones in the pots to plant..Thank you for your review Gee..

[Lisasview]

Hi Gee, I just submitted my new version of my Sonnet.
Worked on it quite along time..Plus, I just submitted a new poem Pearls..working on that one now.. Hope you have time to take a peak..