Pressure

You look around and see other kids,

Smoking pot, or drinking alcohol.

You think ‘hey I wonder what that tastes like’,

You start thinking you’ll try it.

Don’t do it!

It’s not as fun as it looks!

It messes up your life!

God put it on this earth, yes,

But it doesn’t mean,

That he wanted you to do it.

It’ll mess up your life!

Careful,

Don’t fall into pressure.

Reviews

[~ Otto Girl ~]

very true i have seen it happen when your friend dyes of a over dose or alchol posioning. God put it on our earth to put us through a test so he can chanllege us and teach us a lesson but i dont think i was going to be this hard. Keep up your wrting they have alot of emtion.

[Michael X]

this is real and true, and powerfully subtle messege, even draws upon a messege of inspiration and just causes, in any regards, its an excellent straightforward poem, I really liked it, keep it up

[aftervision]

you are so right with this message my poet -- a public broadcast for the world to see -- trouble is the ones that need it will run from this message -- wonderful words

[Mike Espinosa]

Interesting. I liked that you brought in God to the discussion. I think that's a point of the debate that is usually skipped over. I also liked that you made the line punctuation in a way that they would read normally when put together, but I think 'uncapitalizing' some of the lines might help that kind of writing. That's what I try to do, at least.

[Nickle]

hmm...if i can remember...this is different than ur other poems that u have written...this one seems to have an obvious and clear message to it...im glad ur starting to expand the subjects on the poems u write...keep going :)...challenge urself some more by trying something i call abstract poetry...it's when u write about something that has a clear feeling/ motive/ meaning to it but u say it in a nonchalant way by not making it completely noticeable to the reader...the reason y i say that is because u definitely have the emotion in ur poems...now just keep writing and challenging urself...good job :)

[The Analog Kid]

Good message!

[Sarah]

was there something that made you want to write this? its good lol just askin

[Ruth]

Poignant and very true hon, a powerful write xx