The Sun Sets

The Sun Sets

A Poem by Hannah Erickson

Black lines with smaller gray ones
That violate their ends
Pace their way along the velvet sky like parasitic vines.
It is a desperate, futile attempt to reach the noon sun.
But the glowing sphere trips on a cloud, falls,
And the trees may not retrace their steps.
They appear shattered as glass,
Torn as a toddlers clothes
After a long day of of exploring a sylvan yard.
Birds alight themselves-
A pulse
A shock
It shatters wooden spirits to their roots,
Tearing the trees from their daze-
Determination.
Hardened, mossy skin continues to grow.
The light-globe must ascend again.
Hope.
The sun will climb as they do,
It races to shine light on all that is green,
But runs a race with no finish line-
No rest.
Stars do not blink.
That is an atmospheric illusion.
No, the sky's fireflies can only die,
Leave a darkness like no other-
A void that was once occupied
That mourns the loss of its only companion-
The entity only missed because it was once known.

© 2008 Hannah Erickson


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Black lines with smaller gray ones
That violate their ends
Pace their way along the velvet sky like parasitic vines.
It is a desperate, futile attempt to reach the noon sun.

--Love these lines...the imagery is so vivid and so different from anything that I've seen before.

A good poem paints a picture, and this one truly does paint a picture of something that I have not see before. Wonderfully written, nicely done!

Posted 16 Years Ago


Ummmm, I'm almost speechless...and can't even describe how elegant this write is...or begin to choose a favorite line(s). I have to put this in my library so I can return to absorb it again and again...

Fine, fine writing...

Satine

Posted 16 Years Ago


I am gobsmacked that nobody has reviewed this. This is really great. It's full of punchy jaw dropping imagery and lines "Pace their way along the velvet sky like parasitic vines" That's awesome, so is "No, the sky's fireflies can only die,"
Good Stuff
Jaff :)

Posted 16 Years Ago



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212 Views
3 Reviews
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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on February 21, 2008
Last Updated on February 21, 2008

Author

Hannah Erickson
Hannah Erickson

Oakland, CA



About
This is the only place where my writing from high school still exists. A lot of it is embarrassing to adult me, but I'm not going to begrudge teenage me of her thoughts and feelings. I may add som.. more..

Writing