Why you and me?...let alone anyone.

I can not save you and

that really hurts.

To see you suffer every

day break my heart.

I try to forget its serious

and life threatening to

numb my emotions and 

thoughts. And focus on

just you moaning about

every day crap of hospital

time keeping over running

and general stuff.

Your exhausted stressed

anxious worried to say

the least.

Do you have a future?

12 week wait after treatment

and then what?

Why is this world cruel?

Why did this have to happen

to you?

I don´t help at times myself

as all this is affecting me 

also.

I failed you and myself

and God for not supporting

you better and helping

let alone listen to you

properly.

I  wish it was me not you

suffering as you can

not handle it, truth is

who could? As it,s so

brutal and harsh the

cancer, the treatment

and side affects and

the final wait for

outcome.