How Do I Heal

How can I get through it without reopening old wounds

How do I heal

without the memories splitting my skull,

breaking free from the prison I put them in

to protect myself from me. 

How do I find any peace of mind

if I have been at war with myself for ages

when I don’t even know where I put 

my white flag,

it might be under the remains of my soul,

burned black in the battle 

that left me looking for my humanity.

How do I look forward 

if my neck is permanently back,

looking for answers in a world that doesn’t give any

toes pointed toward sunshine

head towards pain

and there is nothing in my brain 

saying, stay safe

there is nothing telling me how to stay sane. 

These days I ask myself how I can heal, 

without ripping myself apart again

remembering what got me here

and I am left to pick up each piece

of who I am

and tear it apart 

hoping that one day I’ll learn how to 

put myself back together again.

Reviews

[Dianne S Penfold]

Raw and bitter. I like it. It really speaks of the torment we go through and the grueling process of making sense of it all.