Her Band (Revised)

         Silence enveloped me as I see her. Her dress of mesh, her smile so bright, an angel amongst a sea of people. I never figured I would know her, I didn't know she existed. As she gets closer, the music around her fades, the backdrop turns dark, my mind only focusing on her. The irises in my brown eyes dialate as tears slowly fall, splashing onto my bowtie, turning a few spots dark.

          I hold the small silver band in between my fingers, alowing it to slide onto my middle finger, but it's small frame barely slides past my finger's first joint. I imagine sliding it onto her soft finger, imagine it glistening on her left hand. I smile at her and quickly look down to prevent distraction away from her radiant beauty.

         I blink away tears and take a deep breath, gathering myself together to stop anymore crying when I see it. My own words, etched forever into the circle of precious metal.

         "A ma rose, avec l'amour, le Gage."

         And it is then that I realize she is forever mine.

Reviews

[Vartul]

So Short!.Yet...you've captured the essence, the very feelings that arise when one is in love.Beautiful! why don't you try your hand at longer pieces with similar themes? I'm sure you'll excel at it.I almost feel like breaking your head, for you've not uploaded any other stories, and you've deprived me the chance to enjoy more of your stories.(i'll try to parcel you a hammer with detailed instructions as to the procedure of breaking your head)(Don't(do?) take me seriously. i get mental at times.)

[Rima]

Nice detail, I looked through it and didn't see any grammatical or spelling errors. I like it! Good job!