Serenity

So,I decided to write you a letter. A lot of the times I write better then I talk. I cant seem to find the words to speak, when I feel a certain way. So writing, helps. I wanted you to know, when we shared that "moment" on the ride to see Christopher, I felt for you. And for some reason, it touched me in a way that I couldn't forget you. After spending time with you, I have learned a lot more about you and about myself. The anger you feel the pain that I feel you have, hurts me deeply. When I look into your eyes, all I want to do is cry. I want to hug you till the pain subsides. When I think about you, I know that you are meant to be 'much more' in my life and in your own. I don't know if that means that we are to be a deeper 'kind of friend" or if that we are meant to be 'Together'. All I know is putting a title to whatever relationship that we may had, or have, or yet to have has no true title. You said once before, that Something greater put us together. So much greater then any tragedy. The bond that I have with you, is rare. So rare, so pure that the strength between us, could either break us or build us. What I feared, was you to ever feel 'hate' towards me. I couldn't bare your disapproval or hatred towards me. I need your respect and your acceptance as God has for you. I do not want you hurting. I know that I fucked up with you, and you have no idea how much it breaks my heart. The last thing I ever want to do to you, is hurt you! I know that my place in your life is to show you a whole new life other then the one you have lived and/or living. I am suppose to give you feelings of joy and happiness. Peace and Serenity. Something that you have given me! I lost my way, with you. And for that I am very Sorry for. I have too much love and care for you to let us steer each other wrong. I want to re-right our relationship. Because we are meant to be in each others lives. I hope one day you can forgive me as I have already forgiven you. I do love and care for you! This I do know and feel. I also appreciate everything you have shown me and shared with me. Having the real you meant so much to me that no hurt could ever replace or devalue how much you mean to me as a person. You are very important to me and to the way of the world. And you will always be more to me. So, I will be watching you as God does! Till it's our time again. 

Xoxo

Always with nothing between a thumb and pointer...

Your Lovebug.