Tryst

A 100 words story

Tryst

My name is You, he had introduced himself when they first met at a primary school: the superficiality of Michael’s toil on the outward land. He had tripped on an upward stairs because of an informed backward glance at Jerry that swayed him momentarily to his Tom’s syndrome of masculine enjoyment. It had felt like being on the edge of a knife yet he didn’t bleed as they had both maintained several boyboy tryst afterwards like the bone of his bone and the flesh of earth’s flesh, from sunny day to good Friday until the eclipse and its revival festival.

Reviews

[JayG]

The problem is that most of the story lives in your head and didn't make it to the page. When you read it you have two things that the reader lacks: Context and intent. So for you, whose mind fills in the necessary context as you read, it works. For you, every word acts as a pointer to images, action, and more, all stored in your head and waiting to be called into your mind.

The reader? They have what the words you chose suggest to them, based on their life-experience, not yours. So for the reader, every word acts as a pointer to images, action, and more, all stored in *YOUR* head and waiting to be called into *YOUR* mind. But since you're not there to supply that when the reader turns t the first paragraph...

That's why we write from our chair, but must edit from the chair of a reader, one who has no context we don't either provide or evoke from their memory, has no idea of where we are, what's going on, or whose skin we wear.

In our school days we learn, literally, nothing of the skills needed for the profession of Fiction-Writing—not even that they exist. Instead, we spent our time perfecting the fact-based and author-centric skills needed for reports and essays.

So..if writing fiction is your goal, some time spent on acquiring the necessary skills is required, because using nonfiction writing technique for fiction results in what reads like a report. And your stories deserve better. Right?

Hit the library's fiction-writing section.

Jay Greenstein
https://jaygreenstein.wordpress.com/category/the-craft-of-writing/the-grumpy-old-writing-coach/