The Artist

You were an artist of pain.

Your hands are as soft as the pillow

that I lay my head on at night

I have been dreaming,

dreaming of torture and executions

people tied up to the walls

 

 Under those sheets my hands became yours

you were an artist

an artist of pain

and I was your canvas

your brush was like a blade

trailing along the skin

blood like paint

splattered

and made the most beautiful landscape

 

You painted a masterpiece

that I had to eventually turn to ashes

in the scorching flames

 but still you see right through me

like an x-ray

you pick out my bones

like a hungry dog.

 

and now

my tears

they burn like acid

down my cheeks

taking with them

my flesh

like candle wax.

Reviews

[emipoemi]

......wow! There is a high intensity of power to this! The images are strong, the flow is relatively neat; you make some repetitions that aren't really necessary (they add nothing to the overall piece, and sometimes they mar the flow), so I would suggest taking a look at those. But this is overall brilliant! I could feel the power that it exuded. Well done!

[olympiuslu]

Thank you so much, always grateful for your comments!

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.

[Abhishek Izy]

This is a well written dark and equally thought provoking piece. You can imagine well and that says in your piece

[olympiuslu]

Thank you!

[Crosby Idasa]

'and now my tears, they burn like acid' nice write

[olympiuslu]

Thank you!

[Richard John Davis]

good good good i liked it. It was like a paper cut.

[olympiuslu]

I'll take that as a compliment, thank you!

[Nipplegrinder]

This is really impressive. You chose the words well.

[olympiuslu]

Thank you!

[Kelly Scheppers]

"Under those sheets my hands became yours
you were an artist
an artist of pain
and I was your canvas..."

Powerful lines and great closure...I'd say you were the artist!

[olympiuslu]

Wow that is so nice of you, thanks!

[Ruth]

Superb imagery and emotion! This is really something...drew me in and didn't release me from beginning to end, sublime power woven in this :)

[olympiuslu]

Thank you very much, that is so kind of you!

[Haley]

very powerful, very intense. well done :)

[olympiuslu]

Thank you!

[aspen]

oh wow, this is painfully beautiful! you created something so heartbreaking but chose to put a practically elegant view on it, it is so somber yet so lovely. If this poem is an experience of the writer, I can say that you have the power to overcome any pain by turning it into gold just like you did with this poem.

[olympiuslu]

Wow thank you! That is so kind of you and I really needed that.

[barleygirl]

This is brilliantly written! I'm not a big fan of heartbreak pieces, but here you've outdone the other ten million heartbreak poems by many miles. Your imagery is intense & yet gradually flowing to a crescendo of feeling. Your imagery is such an exquisite blend of beautiful & terrible, exactly the way it can be when love hurts. Here, for the first time, I'm convinced about why some people stay in bad situations -- your seductively painful lines are THAT impactful! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[olympiuslu]

That is such a compliment, I really appreciate it Margie thank you!

[Coyote Poetry]

Wonderful use of words. You made the reader believe and understand every word. A artist can steal our heart and leave us wanting more. Thank you my friend for reading and the comment.
Coyote

[olympiuslu]

Thank you!!

[Coyote Poetry]

A amazing poem and you are welcome.