Is it crazy?

A little something I wrote, out of passionate love (: review, review, review!

Is it crazy..

That I could stare at your eyes forever

Brilliant green..

Adorned with a blending ring of hazel

To lie here..

And just gaze into their depth makes me melt away

A different world..

Is what it feels to be with you, to be in your arms.

Your hands..

They caress my face, rubbing my soft cheeks

Callused fingers..

From nights of playing your bass to me, all my favorite songs

Moving..

Up and down my arms, a delicate motion

My eyes wander..

Down your face, to the stubble on your chin and on your jaw

You smile..

Your teeth so perfect, ivory white

Your lips so full..

Teasing me with their closeness, calling me to come to them

My nose..

You kiss, my cheek, my neck

Slowly..

You start at my chest, each time coming closer up my body

Closer..

Now my heart is pounding, a magnetic attraction forming, calling our lips together

And yet..

You tease me, still creeping up my neck, now at my chin

You stop..

Playing with my hair all the while, you gaze into my eyes once more

Together..

Our foreheads come together, we lock eyes for what feels like eternity of bliss

Finally..

You kiss me, our lips moving together in perfect synchrony, never to leave again.

Author's Note

*edited!

Reviews

[Angelheaded Hipster]

Okay. Youre asking for a review. I am not in any way, dismantling you, the writer. I am going to be talking about the piece. Funny thing about writing...the piece is your voice, but once its done....its in the winds, and you can breathe again.

Now.

Youre telling me this is a passionate write. Where is the passion? I have read your writing four times, and generally, after that, I can pick up on subtleties, but here, Im just reading a list of general characteristics that are appealing to you.
Theres nothing wrong with making a list...but I want to feel the flame that you have for this man. I guess what Im asking for is more description. More body movements. Make him come alive...make the girl come alive...make the kiss pop out at us, and go "Damn!! I want that kiss!"

[Wicahpi]

Those bass players ...

I was just reading this entry into my Poetry of Love contest,
which I thank you for! Sweet sentiments for someone whom
you obviously adore. Playful teasing is always good!

I wish you luck in the contest.